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The place where the world comes together in honesty and mirth.
Windmills Tilted, Scared Cows Butchered, Lies Skewered on the Lance of Reality ... or something to that effect.


Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Science News

What's the difference?

What is the difference between a English actuary and a Sicilian actuary?

An English actuary can tell you how many people are going to die next year.
A Sicilian actuary can give you their names...

Daily Funny

This morning I woke up to the unmistakable scent of pigs in a blanket.

That's the price you pay for letting the relatives stay over.

Unusual Holidays and Celebrations

Hope have enjoyed No Housework Day today!

But they didn't say anything about no yardwork and boy, my muscles are cold and sore. (it was only 42 degrees Fahrenheit with a 25 mph wind gusting all bloody day - it's the second bloody week of April, folks ... around here that's supposed to mean 65 degrees Fahrenheit on a COLD day!)

Liars and Fools

Liars and Fools: The Faux News edition

After stating, "I am not saying that Obama is a fascist," Faux's Brick compares auto bailout to actions of German companies "in the early days of Adolf Hitler"
Cultural governing systems and History classes begin at 5am sharp - be there!

Faux's Brick: "We're not marching to socialism, we're marching toward fascism."
We're marching away from both, but staring at the mirror does distort one's perspective.

Faux's Brick airs photos of Hitler, Stalin, Lenin, asks, "Is this where we're headed?"
See, the message above about mirrors.

Faux's Brick claims "we've been on this road" to "fascism" "since Teddy Roosevelt"
Well, almost correct. Actually since Lincoln with little success until raygun and the shrub family because the Roosevelts (and Teddy was a Republican by the way) and the other Democrats saved this nation from Fascism. Just was they are doing today.

Cuntler falls for fake Obama NASCAR story that Dimbulb said no-one would believe
The shrill shrew is as dumb as they come.

Fostering fear, Faux Nation wonders: "Is Obama targeting Catholics?"
Fear mongering, plain and simple.

Faux News is still reporting repugican talking points word-for-word as news
And we are surprised by this, how?!

Faux News ambush crew pursues history professor with false claims -- and is proud of it
Again, are we surprised?!

Faux News joins Randall Terry inspired crusade against Notre Dame and Barack Obama
More fear mongering from the fear masters.

Faux News accuses White House of trying to impose Sharia Law in US
In that case all those at Faux News please line up for your 1000 lashes to be adminstered in a public flogging upon your nude bodies.

Faux News falsely claims Obama budget "4 times bigger than the shrub's costliest plan"
It has got to be that 'new math' they have been talking about since the 1970s that they're using because in the good old math I learned that is not how the numbers add up - not even close.

Faux News pushes false claims that estate tax would harm family farms and small businesses
It won't hurt mine and I am one of those 97% of Americans getting a tax break (you'd think I would have liked the shrub, but I have a working brain and I am not in the top 1% anyway, so fat lot of good it would have done me to like the asshole anyway). Now if that tax break was for 99% of Americans then I'd be getting a break ...

Interviewing Coleman (r-Minnesota), Faux & Friends repeatedly gets it wrong
Surprise, surprise ... Faux gets it wrong! Not really, I was just joking about the surprise thing.

Faux News cuts 15 seconds from ad critical of Rove, then 'analyzes' what's left
Deception most foul, or typical Faux News 'anal -izing' to put it plainly.

Faux's Handjob: Obama "harbors deep resentment" of America, just like Dixie Chicks
How do America Haters like Handjob get off saying Patriots are not patriots? Strange way to get their jollies, isn't it?

Faux's Handjob truncates Obama quote to claim it was an example of "blame America first"
Another typical deception - only use part of a citation ... the part that makes you point or you think it does. Especially when the entire citation blows you and your postion out of the water.

Faux's Handjob lies saying Obama "seemingly apologized for our engagement in the war on terror"
See the message above about partial citations. Sheeesh.

While discussing whether media is "anti-religion," Faux's O'Really claims media does not target Muslims "because they might get their house blown up"
Watch it O'Really your bigotry, hatred and paranoia are shining through and burning our eyes.

Faux's O'Really says Obama is selling us out to 'one world government'
Actually he is retreiving us from the 'one world government' - getting rid of Waggoner and those that will follow is crumbling the evil shrub empire and shadow world government through hyper-inflated bogus finanical institutions and multi-national corporations.

Faux's Varney: Europeans hated the shrub because they're "pacifist pagans" who "hate practicing overt Christians"
With what 'practicing overt christians' did to Pacifist Pagans in Europe in the past - what do you think they would feel toward one of those 'practicing overt christians' today anyway ... all warm and cuddly. Fantasyland must be hemorrhaging (or is that hemorrhoiding) with all the stuff these nutcases like Varney are sniffing. It must be cut with Phosphate laden detergent as well.

The 8-hour day makes a comeback

The 8-hour day makes a comeback

High-powered executives who once worked crazy hours are now embracing the 9—5 workday.

The 8-hour day

Also:

Marine Corps Hymn


Semper Fi

President Obama reminds the world that the US is not a Christian nation.

"One of the great strengths of the United States," the President said, "is ... we have a very large Christian population -- we do not consider ourselves a Christian nation or a Jewish nation or a Muslim nation. We consider ourselves a nation of citizens who are bound by ideals and a set of values."

Oh, I can hear the repugican blowhards now. Belching venom and spitting bile. The truth hurts them so.

We have NEVER been nor EVER WILL be a christian nation.

Read more here.

Violations of $75 million

The perfidious assholes who run Pfizer have paid approximately $75-million for violating Nigerian and international law by using sick children as guinea pigs.

When they've raked in multiple billions, paying $75 million is chump change.

Read more here.

Health News


Something you might want to know

Despite four outbreaks of salmonella illness from peanut products in the past three years, the federal government has not changed the safety measures required of peanut companies or instructed its inspectors to test for the bacteria.

Read more here.

Liars and Fools

The Liars and Fools of the day include:

There is an orchestrated wing-nut smear plot attacks Obama nominee Koh
Ah, standard operating procedure, I see.

On tour to oppose EFCA, Joe (who ain't a plumber) admits he knows "little" about EFCA, and gets jeered by workers
If they could have gotten closer to him 'jeering' was not all he would have gotten.

Dimbulb continues myths that Community Reinvestment Act and Barney Frank (D-Massachusetts) responsible for mortgage crisis
In other words investing in neighborhoods (read: nigger hoods) and homosexuals and not the wanton greed and avarice of the financial whores are responsible for the fiasco wrought by those self same financial whores. Now, I get it.

Dimbulb adds comment about "anal poisoning" to long litany of ass-cracks
He should know, he's 'poisoned' many a young boy's anus in Central America

North compares expansion of AmeriCorps program to Nazism and Stalinism, "free enterprise" to Julius Caesar
Somebody needs a lesson in both cultural governing systems and history, badly!

Politico gets the facts and slant wrong on Coleman-Franken recount in Minnesota
And this is news, how?

NewsMax's Reagan makes baseless claim, hurls Nazi smear
When will the Nazis' learn not to call others Nazis in the hopes you won't see them for what they truly are?

Arch-right RedState website urges violence against elected government officials
Criminal and Seditious - Criminal and Seditious

Disney's Savage: "We have a naked Marxist for president"
Again, somebody needs a lesson on cultural governing systems, in the worst way.

Disney's Savage prays that "Obamas don't take down the pictures of Lincoln and such and replace them with, you know, Malcolm X"
Damn, Fantasyland must be an awful place.

Disney's Savage on Iowa Supreme Court gay marriage ruling: A "victory for perversion"
One pervert calling someone else a pervert - now, that, is too rich!

Democrats are godless Nazis, says World Net Daily
Actually, the repugican party here in the USA is what the Nazi party in Germany was modeled after ... cultural governing systems and history lessons will begin promptly at 5am sharp!

Bachmann's (batshit loon-Minnesota) amendment against non-existent plot to replace dollar gains support
From China of all places.

Bachmann (stark mad raving lunatic-Minnesota) fears the Obama administration will create "re-education camps for young people"
Education and learning is what we will be providing. Indoctorination and warping and perverting young minds is over.

Huckabee (nutjob-Arkansas) says to "let the air out of [Democrats'] tires and do not let them out of their driveway on election day"
Typical - trying to supress the vote in all way they can because they'd never be able to steal an election if just one quarter of the registerd Democrats came out to vote on any election day (that's not counting other sane Americans who would vote for real issues and not demogouary).

King (r-Iowa) foretells plague of gay marriages
Doubtful, there just aren't that many people in Iowa, so it stands to reason there aren't that many gay people, either.

repugicans on the House Budget Committee present made-up stats and graphs
Which they pulled out of their collective arses during the restroom break ... in the restroom.

Weeks after clearing up mis-interpretations of MIT research, repugican officials are still citing the falsehoods as facts
Ok, so what else is new?

Anti-gay preacher Warren lies and says that he never compared gay marriage to incest and pedophilia
Oh, Really? How many links to you doing just that do you want listed here?

CNBC's Cramer calls Democrats "Bolsheviks" and says "the House ... might as well be Nancy Pelosi's own Politburo"
Damn, his jokes are getting better! The fool thinks he's serious, and that is the best joke of all!

Center for Security Policy's Gaffney claims that Obama is speaking in code
Take off the tin-foil hat, then, and you can understand proper English when it is spoken.

America's Most Endangered Rivers

Levee Break Sacramento-San Joaquin river photo
Levee break, Sacramento-San Joaquin River in California. Image credit:American Rivers/Aquafornia blog.

From outdated flood control schemes to harmful dams and mining projects, our nation’s rivers and clean water are at risk. Today, we released America’s Most Endangered Rivers: 2009 edition, spotlighting ten rivers in need of urgent action. Learn more and take action to help the rivers at AmericanRivers.org See summary descriptions the 10 most endangered rivers presented below.

The Treehugger article continues: America's 10 Most Endangered Rivers Of 2009

Greenest Ideas So Far

From TreeHugger:

obama greenest ideas photo

Photo via Pressmedya

Okay, sure—Obama's only been in office for a couple months now, and we're getting all congratulatory. But there's a reason for that: many of the ideas he and his administration have come out with so far are pretty damn good ones. And there have been plenty of them, too. These 7 are the best he's come up with so far.

Article continues: Obama's 7 Greenest Ideas So Far

Otherworldly Scenes

Strange communities of extreme microbes found in hostile environments at the bottom of the sea.

Some companies say layoffs aren't an option

Some companies say layoffs aren't an option

Even in a severe downturn, these employers promise not to slash jobs.

Layoffs aren't an option

Also:

Italian rescuers pull woman from quake rubble

Italian rescuers pull woman from quake rubble

Rescuers pull a 20-year-old woman from the wreckage of a five-story building, 42 hours after it collapsed.

Italian rescuers pull woman from quake rubble

Also:

And I Quote

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start.
So far today, I have finished 2 bags of M&M`s and a chocolate cake.
I feel better already.

~ Dave Berry

Headlines

Headlines for April 7, 2009

Is the economy turning around?

Follow the link to vote in the poll.
VOTE: Is the economy turning around?

The recession's end may be in sight, say recent public polls and some economists' predictions. What's your take?

VOTE

Also:

Is premium gas really better for your car?

Is premium gas really better for your car?

HowStuffWorks.com - Regular unleaded is cheaper, but it's not always the best choice depending on the conditions.

Is premium gas really better for your car?

Also:

Question: Is premium gas really better for your car?
Answer: Simply put ... NO.
(Having been in the Gas and Oil Biz for decades I can tell you the 'Premium gas is better for your car' bullshit is just that, bullshit ... and a great cash cow for the gas retailers, by the way.)

When to use a credit card versus debit card

When to use a credit card versus debit card

There are certain purchases where it makes sense to use one type of card over the other.

When to use a credit card versus debit card

Also:

Family reunited with dog lost overboard

Remember that post about a dog earlier?
Here's another version.
Family reunited with dog lost overboard

AFP - The family's pet fell off a boat into rough seas and swam to a deserted island, surviving for four months before being found.

Family reunited with dog lost overboard

Also:

Woman with beer can in hand starts brawl at wake

Only in America ... Ok, ok, so maybe in Ireland, as well.

Sheriff's deputies said a Texas woman started a brawl at a wake in Arkansas when she arrived with a beer can in her hand.

Full Story

'Spray-on Viagra' helps men last six times longer

A spray helping men to last six times longer during sex has been developed by British doctors.

Full Story

Question of the Day

Science edition:

Is Alzheimer's the result of a burnt-out brain?

Healthy young adults carrying a gene variant that is a major risk factor for the disorder seem to have extra activity in brain regions related to memory.

Schizophrenics see through hollow-mask illusion

Healthy people can't easily tell the front from the rear of a mask, but people with schizophrenia find it easy – a finding that may provide a new test for the condition.

Schizophrenics see through hollow-mask illusion

Global Warming News


Ice
Arctic winter sea-ice reaches a larger maximum area than in 2008 but is still in long-term decline, say scientists.

Medical Workers' Role in Torture

A 2007 report by the International Committee of the Red Cross concluded that medical professionals helped the CIA torture detainees held at Guantánamo Bay prison and other "black sites" overseas, and said their participation in the abuse amounted to a "gross breach of medical ethics.

The report was kept secret until recently.

From New York Times:
Based on statements by 14 prisoners who belonged to Al Qaeda and were moved to Guantánamo Bay, Cuba, in late 2006, Red Cross investigators concluded that medical professionals working for the C.I.A. monitored prisoners undergoing waterboarding, apparently to make sure they did not drown. Medical workers were also present when guards confined prisoners in small boxes, shackled their arms to the ceiling, kept them in frigid cells and slammed them repeatedly into walls, the report said.

Facilitating such practices, which the Red Cross described as torture, was a violation of medical ethics even if the medical workers' intentions had been to prevent death or permanent injury, the report said. But it found that the medical professionals' role was primarily to support the interrogators, not to protect the prisoners, and that the professionals had "condoned and participated in ill treatment."

At times, according to the detainees' accounts, medical workers "gave instructions to interrogators to continue, to adjust or to stop particular methods."

The Red Cross report was completed in 2007. It was obtained by Mark Danner, a journalist who has written extensively about torture, and posted Monday night with an article by Mr. Danner on the Web site of The New York Review of Books. Much of its contents were revealed in a March article by Mr. Danner and in a 2008 book, "The Dark Side," by Jane Mayer of The New Yorker, but the reporting of the Red Cross investigators' conclusions on medical ethics and other issues are new.

Card Skimmer

You've heard of them but you've probably never seen one ... and neither have the police apparently!

A Consumerist reader found a card skimmer on a WaMu ATM. He ripped it off and reported it to the police and the bank. The police said they'd never actually seen one in real life.

And they're there to 'protect' us!?

The Most Dangerous Person in the World?

Are you an American who worries about terrorism? Then stop.

If you truly want to worry about something ... read, John Goekler's Counterpunch article on the statistically likely killers that you need to fear:
According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, between 310,000 and 580,000 of us will commit suicide by cigarette this year. Another 260,000 to 470,000 will go in the ground due to poor diet and sedentary lifestyle. And some 85,000 of us will drink to our own departure.

After the person in the mirror, the next most dangerous individual we're ever likely to encounter is one in a white coat. Something like 200,000 of us will experience "cessation of life" due to medical errors - botched procedures, mis-prescribed drugs and "nosocomial infections". (The really nasty ones you get from treatment in a hospital or healthcare service unit.)

The next most dangerous encounter the average American is likely to have is with a co-worker with an infection. Or a doorknob, stair railing or restaurant utensil touched by someone with the crud. "Microbial Agents" (read bugs like flu and pneumonia) will send 75,000 of us to meet the Reaper this year.

If we live through those social encounters, the next greatest danger is "Toxic Agents" - asbestos in our ceiling, lead in our pipes, the stuff we spray on our lawns or pour down our clogged drains. Annual body count from these handy consumer products is around 55,000...

Imagine what the world could look like if we made a conscious choice to live out whatever time we have with courage, compassion, service and joy.

Terrorism is an act of the weak. But so is walking through the airport in our socks.

A Slice of Phliosophy

Must not all things at the last be swallowed up in death?

~ Plato

Aftershock rocks Italy, death toll passes 200

Aftershock rocks Italy, death toll passes 200

A 4.9-magnitude tremor sends rescue workers scrambling the day after a deadly earthquake.

Aftershock rocks Italy, death toll passes 200

More:

Only in America: Nuts and Poo

Wisconsin hopes to protect kids from Capitol nuts

Wisconsin is asking people to refrain from feeding squirrels at the state Capitol because they might inadvertently harm a child with a peanut allergy.

Full Story

Man fined for sending poop through the mail

A South Dakota man has been fined and sentenced to probation for sending a letter containing animal feces to a local government office.

Full Story

Our Readers

Some of our readers today have been in:

Waterloo, Ontario, Canada
Berlin, Berlin, Germany
Brisbane, Queensland, Australia
Brampton, Ontario, Canada
Pegnitz, Bayern, Germany
Sandviken, Gavleborgs Lan, Sweden
Haarlem, Noord-Holland, Netherlands
Islamabad, Islamabad, Pakistan
Stuttgart, Baden-Wurttemburg, Germany
Seoul, Seoul T'ukpyolsi, Republic of Korea
Auckland, Auckland, New Zealand
Krakow, Malopolskie, Poland
Vilnius, Vilnaius Apskritis, Lithuania
Cambridge, England, United Kingdom
Toronto, Ontario, Canada

as well as the Russian Federation and the United States

Daily Horoscope

Today's horoscope says:

You should feel free to take things at a leisurely pace today, because time is definitely going to be on your side!

I can deal with that.