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The place where the world comes together in honesty and mirth.
Windmills Tilted, Scared Cows Butchered, Lies Skewered on the Lance of Reality ... or something to that effect.


Friday, July 31, 2009

Things to do this weekend

Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.
See If They Slow Down.

Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Marijuana'

Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

Sing Along At The Opera.

When the money comes Out The ATM, scream 'I Won! I Won!'

Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

And most importantly:

PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.

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