John Coltrane
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Lew Powell's 32nd annual Carolina Follies
2008: Misconduct! Manipulation! Money-grubbing!
... And that's just United Way
Worst new idea of the year:
Sam Massell, promoter of Atlanta's Buckhead neighborhood, offered this advice to Charlotte: “The ‘South Park' cartoon out there … can leave a very negative impression for people. … Your leaders might want to consider changing the area's name. Doing that would make national news.”
And WMDs! I'm SURE there were WMDs!
In her supposed memoir, “The Last Dance for Grace,” Durham stripper Crystal Mangum wrote, “I want to assert, without equivocation, that I was assaulted.”
Worst new song of the year:
“Chapel on the Hill,” performed by the High and Mighties. Sample lyrics: “Hit Peppers Pizza for a slice walking down Franklin Street/ Pass a lady selling flowers, Hare Krishnas kick their beat.”
Worst new song of the year (runner-up):
“It's So Much Fun to Be This Good,” performed by the Bad Daddies for the Charlotte Chamber. Sample lyrics: “Pro-business attitude/Three-five-two-one latitude.”
Hey, don't let it stifle your opinions – there's always WBT:
An unidentified N.C. State student, apologizing for having spray-painted “Hang Obama by a Noose” in the Free Expression Tunnel, said, “My intentions were simply to express my views on the outcome of the election, but went too far.”
Worst new smell of the year:
“UNC for Women … a refreshing, airy and sparkling fragrance with soft base notes evoking the beauty, romance and Southern charm of Carolina's Old Well.” $60 for 3.4 ounces.
Worst old smell of the year:
Mac McCarley, Charlotte city attorney, likened the scent of Wallace Farm to “vomit heated in a frying pan.”
Pa would've rolled over in his grave – if he'd ever gotten there:
While serving an arrest warrant, New Hanover County sheriff's deputies plunged a funeral into chaos by Tasering the dead man's son, who was serving as pallbearer.
Understatement of the year:
Curiously out of touch with how United Way came to have a job opening, interim CEO Mac Everett speculated that “people maybe have a reason to be angry, I don't know.”
Blunderstatement of the year:
S.C. Gov. Mark Sanford, attempting to explain to Wolf Blitzer how John McCain's economic policies differ from President Bush's: “Um, yeah. I mean for instance, take, you know, um, uh, take for instance the issue of, uh, of, um (drums fingers), I'm drawing a blank, and, I hate it when I do that, particularly on television.”
Blunderstatement understatement of the year:
“Sound bites,” press secretary Joel Sawyer acknowledged, “have never been the governor's strong suit.”
Overstatement of the year:
Impatient about the arrival of $80 million in incentives for not relocating his track, Bruton Smith complained to Concord City Council that “I'm being the victim all over again.”
Overstatement of the year (runner-up):
Two weeks after Bob Steel touted Wachovia's “great future as an independent company,” the bank announced it was selling itself.
Sports historians will note that by 2008 the supply of unused team names had become so depleted that a minor-league baseball franchise in North Carolina resorted to identifying itself with a punctuation mark:
The Winston-Salem Warthogs changed their name to the Dash. (Eat your heart out, Wilkes-Barre!)
Would you want your sister to marry a (North Carolina) legislator?
Barely two years after gutting an ethics bill that would've limited how quickly former legislators could hire on as lobbyists, Drew Saunders of Huntersville, House Utilities Committee chairman, resigned to hire on as a utilities lobbyist.
Would you want your sister to marry a (South Carolina) legislator?
Denying any connection between his political action committee's taking $16,500 from payday lenders and his House committee's killing a reform bill, Harry Cato of Greenville, S.C., insisted, “I know in my heart, when I look in the mirror each morning, that contributions don't influence me. I answer to myself and what I know is right.”
Metaphor of the year:
Explaining how the recession nudged his store for nursing mothers “more toward Main Street and away from Rodeo Drive,” Adam Schmitz said, “We had to look really hard in the mirror and say, ‘There are bags under those eyes, and they're Gucci bags and we've got to get rid of them.'”
Want that with or without angioplasty prep?
New this year at the N.C. State Fair: deep-fried macaroni and cheese.
As a backup offensive lineman, he had long envied the better-known players' boisterous end-zone celebrations. Then one night something … popped:
Panthers lineman Jeremy Bridges was arrested after an incident that started with his spraying other restaurant patrons with Dom Perignon.
Dear God, you know I really MEANT to study harder for that English lit midterm:
In an ill-conceived security exercise, a mock intruder burst into a classroom at Elizabeth City State University, pointed what appeared to be a handgun, ordered the terrified students to line up against a wall and threatened to kill the one with the lowest grade-point average.
*****
Lew's been at this for 32 years, wow! Has it been that long already ... seems like only yesterday.
Had a bad year? '08 memories get shredded in NYC
Should auld acquaintance be forgot? Or maybe shredded?
In an event that organizers hope will become a New Year's tradition, New Yorkers and tourists were invited to bring bad memories from 2008 to Times Square today and feed them to an industrial-strength shredder.
"This is the perfect way to move on from a bad year, from a bad experience," said Kathryn Bonn, of New York City, who shredded a printout of her boyfriend's e-mail breaking up with her.
The event, the second annual "Good Riddance Day," was sponsored by the Times Square Alliance, organizers of the New Year's Eve ball-dropping celebration.
Some participants wrote "the stock market" or "cancer" on a piece of paper and shredded it, while others shredded bags of bank statements and check stubs.
Kate Anello, a Yankees fan from New York City, destroyed a poster of the city's longtime rival, the Boston Red Sox.
"I hate them," she said. "It felt good."
City resident Jay Ballesteros won a $250 prize for the most creative object to be shredded: a sock representing all the socks that emerge from the laundry without their mates.
"I'm hoping to use the prize to buy some brand new socks," he said.
Man spent days unnoticed in family's attic
A Wilkes-Barre, family didn't realize they'd had an unexpected Christmas guest until a man who had been in their attic for days emerged wearing their clothes.
Stanley Carter surrendered Friday after police took a dog to search the home in Plains Township, a suburb of Wilkes-Barre about 100 miles north of Philadelphia. He was charged with several counts of burglary, theft, receiving stolen property and criminal trespass.
"When he came down from the attic, he was wearing my daughter's pants and my sweat shirt and sneakers," homeowner Stacy Ferrance said. "From what I gather, he was helping himself to my home, eating my food and stealing my clothes."
Police said the 21-year-old Carter had been staying with his friends, who are Ferrance's neighbors in a duplex. He apparently accessed the shared attic through a trap door in a bedroom ceiling.
Carter went missing on December 19th and the friends filed a missing person report a few days before Christmas.
Ferrance said she had heard noises but thought they were caused by her three children. She notified police on Christmas Day when cash, a laptop computer and an iPod disappeared, then called police again the next day when she found footprints in her bedroom closet, where the attic trap door is located.
Carter kept a list of everything he took, said Plains Township police Officer Michael Smith.
"When we were going through the inventory of what he did take, we found a note labeled 'Stanley's Christmas List' of all the items he had removed from the residence and donated to himself," Smith said.
Black bears lumber into surprising places
‘They’re everywhere’
Once confined to the mountains and remote coastal swamps, black bears are being spotted in parts of South Carolina for the first time in generations.
Wildlife managers and scientists say black bears not only are increasing their territory but are growing in numbers in the Palmetto State.
“They’re everywhere,” said Skip Still, a state biologist who keeps bear statistics.
Since 2004, people have encountered bears in 36 of the state’s 46 counties, according to the S.C. Department of Natural Resources. In contrast, people in only a handful of counties reported seeing bears in 2004.
The number of black bears declined after European settlers arrived in South Carolina. The settlers cleared land and hunted the animals as pests.
Now, maturing forests provide better habitat for bears, which thrive in woodlands filled with nuts and berries, experts say.
The public’s increased sensitivity to protecting bears also may be contributing to the animals’ rebound.
In some cases, bears have wandered into backyards. Other times, they have ventured into commercial areas. Most of the counties around Columbia have had at least one report of a black bear since 2004, DNR statistics show.
SEEING THE NUMBERS RISE
The shy bruins have been spotted most often in Upstate counties just east and south of South Carolina’s mountains, historically a stronghold for bears in the state.
The Department of Natural Resources confirmed reports of a bear in a steak-house parking lot near Anderson about two years ago.
Reported bear sightings in Anderson County jumped from two in 2004 to 23 this year, DNR statistics show. In Spartanburg County, the number rose from none in 2004 to 57 so far this year, according to DNR statistics.
But bear sightings aren’t just confined to the Upstate. Earlier this year, Lexington County residents videotaped a small black bear near Gilbert.
Some of the sightings may be because people are encroaching on bear habitat or because some of the same bears are moving through multiple counties.
It’s also possible South Carolina has had more bears than originally thought and people are simply reporting them more frequently. Wildlife cameras, increasingly used by hunters and outdoor enthusiasts, have captured images of bears in counties where they weren’t known to live.
State and federal wildlife experts say all of the reported sightings they receive, plus recent research, suggests an increase in the bear population.
Two years ago, the DNR revised its population estimates of South Carolina bears to about 1,200 from several hundred. It based part of its revision on bear surveys.
Black bears, which can weigh up to 600 pounds in South Carolina, aren’t typically aggressive —no one has been injured in the state by a bear in recorded history — but people should be wary when they see one, agency officials say. Experts advise people who encounter a bear to back slowly away from the animal. More than likely, the bear will leave.
Because of the bears’ spread, the DNR developed guidelines this year telling its staff how to deal with bears that come in contact with people.
The agency prefers not to relocate bears, but to discourage the use of things, such as open garbage cans, that attract the animals to areas populated by humans. DNR officials also encourage people not to feed bears. Occasionally, the agency will kill bears that are considered dangerous.
“If you take away the enticements that attract black bears, such as garbage cans, bird feeders, pet food, barbecue grills, compost piles and similar things, then you will likely not have problems with black bears,” DNR wildlife biologist Deana Ruth said.
EXTENDING THEIR TERRITORY
Frank Van Manen, a highly regarded bear biologist with the U.S. Geological Survey, said the South’s once denuded landscape now contains mature forests with plenty of shelter, as well as nuts and fruits. Parts of the Southeast are seeing increases in black bear populations, he said. The population growth has been particularly steady in coastal North Carolina.
“If you look at the bigger picture, it is fair to say that for the last 20 years, and especially the last decade, we’ve seen a very definite increase in range and with it, also an increase in numbers,” Van Manen said.
Bears may be moving into new territory because their traditional home counties — Pickens, Oconee, Horry and Georgetown — are getting too crowded with bears, biologists say. When too many of the animals populate one area, younger ones will move away.
Recent evidence shows bears are reproducing in more counties, as well. At least nine counties now have reproducing populations, compared to about five a decade ago.
The DNR recently added Anderson, Spartanburg, Berkeley and Charleston counties to the list with reproducing bears. Horry, Georgetown, Pickens, Oconee and Greenville have had reproducing populations.
The DNR also documented a mother bear and cubs in Dorchester County for the first time this year, Ruth said.
South Carolina allows a two-week hunting season for black bears in the mountains at the end of October each year. That has been a lightning rod for arguments among sportsmen, environmentalists and animal welfare groups, which say the sport is cruel and unnecessary.
But Still said there appear to be enough bears to withstand hunting pressures. Since 2004, the number of confirmed bear sightings has risen in Oconee, Pickens and Greenville counties from about 40 to 212 this year.
This year, hunters killed 48 bears, just 10 off the state record set in 2007.
In the cooler months after hunting season, bears are less active in South Carolina. They don’t hibernate like bears in colder climates, but they do become more sluggish because there’s not as much food available.
To learn more about the bear population in South Carolina, Van Manen and researchers from the DNR have launched a study near Myrtle Beach. One study in the late 1990s predicted bears near the booming coastal resort would be wiped out by 2010. The current study involves taking the DNA of hair samples collected from bears as they move through coastal forest and bogs.
Since each animal’s DNA is unique, researchers will be able to tell how many different bears exist. They also can tell if the S.C. bears are related to those in North Carolina’s coastal plain.
Van Manen said results of the study are expected by spring.
Ruth said she’s sure the bear population is increasing because motorists killed dozens of bears last year near Myrtle Beach in vehicle collisions.
Preliminary results of the state and federal study show plenty of bears taking bait during field research. Researchers put out day-old Krispy Kreme donuts to attract bears this year.
“We have to learn to live with bears,” Ruth said. “They are here and they are not leaving.”
Oldest man in the US, dies at 112
The nation's oldest man has died at 112.
The son of George Francis says his father died Saturday of congestive heart failure at a nursing home in Sacramento.
The son, 81-year-old Anthony Francis, says his father was born on June 6, 1896 in New Orleans, and that his only wife, Josephine Johnson Francis, died at age 63 in 1964.
UCLA gerontologist Dr. Stephen Coles, who maintains a list of the world's oldest people, says Francis was the oldest man living in the U.S., at 112 years and 204 days.
Coles says the oldest living person in the world is Maria de Jesus of Portugal, who is 115 years and 109 days old.
The son of George Francis says his father died Saturday of congestive heart failure at a nursing home in Sacramento.
The son, 81-year-old Anthony Francis, says his father was born on June 6, 1896 in New Orleans, and that his only wife, Josephine Johnson Francis, died at age 63 in 1964.
UCLA gerontologist Dr. Stephen Coles, who maintains a list of the world's oldest people, says Francis was the oldest man living in the U.S., at 112 years and 204 days.
Coles says the oldest living person in the world is Maria de Jesus of Portugal, who is 115 years and 109 days old.
Pink Moon
Nick Drake
I went out and bought Nick's album after the VolksWagon commercial aired with this song in it - it was the only commercial I have ever paid any attention to ... and it was because of this song.
And I really mean it was the only commercial I have ever paid any attention to - before or since - advertisers hate me ...
And I really mean it was the only commercial I have ever paid any attention to - before or since - advertisers hate me ...
Ash spill deepens the safety debate
The deluge of coal ash sludge that broke through a dike at the TVA's Kingston power plant onto a 300-acre stretch of fields, homes and rivers has made the site ground zero in a fight over how "clean" burning coal to produce electricity can be.
Read more in the Nashville Tennessean
On the verge
Of an energy revolution that is!
New technologies will move the world economy away from coal and other fossil fuels much more rapidly than experts from the energy industry would have the public believe, according to a new study by the Worldwatch Institute.
Read more in the Charleston Gazette
Organic farms unknowingly used a synthetic fertilizer
For as many as seven years, California Liquid Fertilizer sold what seemed to be an organic farmer's dream.
But a state investigation caught the company spiking its product with ammonium sulfate, a synthetic fertilizer banned from organic farms.
But a state investigation caught the company spiking its product with ammonium sulfate, a synthetic fertilizer banned from organic farms.
Read more in the Sacramento Bee
How to Enforce New Marijuana Law
In what is going to be a headache for Massachusetts police and prosecutors ...
“Back in November, Massachusetts voters passed a ballot measure — called Question 2 — that, on Jan. 2, will turn possession of an ounce or less of marijuana into an offense on par with a traffic violation. Now police and prosecutors are wondering how the heck they’re going to enforce it.
Among the questions enforcers are trying to answer:
- What should police do with people caught with several joints who refuse to identify themselves?
- Will state-run laboratories that test drugs seized in criminal cases continue to do so for small quantities of marijuana?
- Will police chiefs discipline officers who spark up a spliff after work?
- Can a judge summarily revoke the probation of a convicted offender on the basis of a citation for possessing less than an ounce of marijuana?
“I’m not suggesting that officers are doing it,” David F. Capeless, president of the Massachusetts District Attorneys Association, told the Globe. “But what you’re doing, whether it’s officers or other public employees - transportation workers, bus drivers, teachers - you’re removing a disincentive by saying: ‘We won’t be able to do anything to you. You won’t get disciplined for this. It won’t mean your job. It may mean a $100 fine.’
Proponents of the change - including financier George Soros, who spent more than $400,000 in favor of decriminalizing marijuana - said it would ensure that those caught with small quantities would avoid the taint of a criminal record.”
The financial crisis may be as serious as the American Revolution
According to Nassim Nicholas Taleb and Benoit Mandelbrot, who have been spot on about it for a long time before the collapse started steamrolling.
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USA, England, Norway, Germany, Latvia, Canada, France, Colombia, India and Sweden,
are enjoying Carolina Naturally.
Meanwhile, over at our sister blog, readers in ...
France, Bulgaria, Germany, Brazil, Sweden, USA, Pakistan, Australia, India, Canada, New Zealand, Poland and England,
are enjoying The Naked, The Nude and The Nekkid.
And I Quote
The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.
~ Marty Feldman.
~ Marty Feldman.
Stalin - Greatest Ever
Huh?! Come again ...
The former Soviet dictator Joseph Stalin may have killed millions of his own people but this weekend he could be chosen by Russians as their greatest-ever countryman.
Inspired by the British competition 100 Greatest Britons, one of Russia's biggest television stations Rossiya has been conducting a nationwide poll for much of this year.
From an original list of 500 candidates now there are just 12 names left from which viewers can select their all-time hero.
The winner will be announced on Sunday.
More than 3.5 million people have already voted and Stalin - born an ethnic Georgian - has been riding high for many months.
In the summer he held the number one slot but was knocked down several places after the producer of the show appealed to viewers to vote for someone else.
Amongst the others on the list are Ivan the Terrible, Lenin, Catherine the Great and Alexander Pushkin.
Read the rest at the BBC.
Worst person in the world
Keith shows you it's not only repugicans who are idiots as he rips Davis for her stupidity.
(Then again Davis has never been more than a corporate stooge anyway)
(Then again Davis has never been more than a corporate stooge anyway)
Suspect arrested in trunk case
Scottish police say a 35-year-old man has been arrested and charged in connection with the abduction of a nurse found tied up in the trunk of her car.
They say she may have been there for up to 10 days.
Officers found Magdeline Makola on Friday in Airdrie, east of Glasgow.
Police say the 38-year-old nurse was dehydrated and had suffered from hypothermia.
The suspect is due to appear in court on Monday.
They say she may have been there for up to 10 days.
Officers found Magdeline Makola on Friday in Airdrie, east of Glasgow.
Police say the 38-year-old nurse was dehydrated and had suffered from hypothermia.
The suspect is due to appear in court on Monday.
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