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The place where the world comes together in honesty and mirth.
Windmills Tilted, Scared Cows Butchered, Lies Skewered on the Lance of Reality ... or something to that effect.

Saturday, February 6, 2016

The Daily Drift

Welcome to Today's Edition of Carolina Naturally.
Today also happens to be Take Your Kids To The Library Day ..! 
Carolina Naturally is read in 205 countries around the world daily.   
Who's up for pancakes ... !
Today is - Canadian Maple Syrup Day

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Today in History

Huguenot rebels and the French sign the Peace of La Rochelle.
France recognizes the United States and signs a treaty of aid in Paris.
Massachusetts becomes the sixth state to ratify the Constitution.
The Battle of Fort Henry, Tenn., begins the Mississippi Valley campaign.
The Dalton Gang commits its first crime, a train robbery in Alila, Calif.
The Spanish-American War ends.
President McKinley appoints W.H. Taft commissioner to report on the Philippines.
Japan’s foreign minister severs all ties with Russia, citing delaying tactics in negotiations over Manchuria.
Germany admits full liability for Lusitania incident and recognizes the United State’s right to claim indemnity.
The Washington Disarmament Conference comes to an end with signature of final treaty forbidding fortification of the Aleutian Islands for 14 years.
Mussolini warns Germany to stop agitation in Tyrol.
Germany accepts Kellogg-Briand pact.
Adolf Hitler‘s Third Reich begins press censorship.
Adolf Hitler opens the Fourth Winter Olympics.
The RAF clears the way as British take Benghazi, trapping thousands of Italians.
Kwajalein Island in the Central Pacific falls to U.S. Army troops.
MacArthur reports the fall of Manila, and the liberation of 5,000 prisoners.
The United States reports that all Soviet offensive arms are out of Cuba.
Cuba blocks the water supply to Guantanamo Naval Base in rebuke of the United State’s seizure of four Cuban fishing boats.
Paris and London agree to build a rail tunnel under the English Channel.
Seven U.S. GIs are killed in a Viet Cong raid on a base in Pleiku.
Charles de Gaulle opens the 19th Winter Olympics in France.
Ford asks Congress for $497 million in aid to Cambodia.
Queen Elizabeth marks her Silver Jubilee.
Civil rights workers begin a march from Carrolton to Montgomery, Alabama.

The 100 Jokes That Shaped Modern Comedy

Vulture has a mega-post with a timeline of comedy history. The title is a bit hyperbolic, because the 100 jokes are limited to the United States in the last 110 years. However, it does include visual gags, one-liners, full skits, movie scenes, standup, long-running jokes, and more, with commentary. There are tons of classics that will make you laugh no matter how many times you’ve heard them, and others you may vaguely remember and will be glad to see again.
“When I’m Good I’m Very Good … But When I’m Bad, I’m Better” -Mae West, 1933
“I was in love with a beautiful blonde once, dear. She drove me to drink. That's the one thing I’m so indebted to her for.” -W.C. Fields, 1941
“Welcome to the Academy Awards, or, as it’s known at my house, Passover.” -Bob Hope, 1968
“Dave’s not here.” -Tommy Chong, 1971
“These go to 11.” -Christopher Guest, 1984
There are a lot of videos. You can read through them in order, or use the timeline to jump around and find your favorites. Some are NSFW, but the description should indicate the subject before you play a sound clip or video. This list could keep you busy for days.

Mysterious masked man has been leaving toe sculptures in art galleries

A mysterious masked man using the pseudonym “Fantômas” has been mimicking a fictional 20th century master of disguise to drop toe sculptures in art galleries in Edinburgh, Scotland. Sporting a white suit, waistcoat, bow-tie and a top hat, the masked man has been breaking gallery rules, sticking life-sized toe art on the walls of some of the city’s best-known cultural venues. The unknown man also leaves behind a hand-written calling card bearing the name “Fantômas,” the title of an infamous villain from a series of 32 pre-World War One French thrillers written by Pierre Souvestre and Marcel Allain.
The motives of the man remain a riddle. It is understood his signature toe and card were first spotted at a student exhibition at Tent Gallery, ECA, though artists at the event did not catch a glimpse of the elusive character. He then appeared at the opening night of the Luc Tuymans’ exhibition at the Talbot Rice Gallery a week later. James Clegg, the curator of the show, confirmed a man arrived wearing a mask and stuck a toe up on the wall, though the artistic body part was taken down immediately. It has also been claimed that Fantômas has also placed toes on a wall at the Ingleby Gallery, though a spokeswoman strongly denied this.
The National Galleries of Scotland confirmed the that the man did visit the Scottish National Gallery, “wearing a mask and leaving behind a small plaster item”. A spokeswoman said: “On his return he was advised by security staff not to deposit items in the galleries, and that visitors wearing a mask or disguise would not be admitted to the premises for security reasons. “He was not evicted from the galleries or barred from returning.” Fantômas also posts YouTube messages. In his latest he claims security guards at one of the National Galleries of Modern Art caught him in the act, at which point he was forced to give up his true identity.
Fantômas said in the clip he “will fall into the shadows, for now, until the dust has cleared”. An informed source, who wished to remain anonymous, revealed that Fantômas had thrown the city art world into turmoil. He said: “He is causing considerable alarm. The question is why is he doing this at all. Is he a critical artist, making a comment on the galleries? Perhaps there is some profound message behind the toe. Is he just a prankster?” The fictional criminal commits appalling crimes: substituting sulphuric acid in the perfume dispensers at a Parisian department store, releasing plague-infested rats on an ocean liner, or forcing a victim to witness his own execution by placing him face-up in a guillotine.

NASH is the 21st Century’s looming public health threat

Image: Woman with abdominal pain (Shutterstock.com)
As many as 25 million adults in the United States suffer from some form of NASH -- and most don’t know it.

America's Rich May Soon Blow Past Roaring Twenties Tycoons

Symmetrical Monsters

A Study of the Beauty of Symmetry in Everyday Life

Some photographers, artists and film auteurs — the late, great Stanley Kubrick, for example — have made careers in part upon bringing the beauty of symmetry to film technique. Some of the best examples are elegant and striking in their simplicity.
On a smaller scale, such are the shots appearing on the Instagram account Symmetrical Monsters. Contributors are steadily showing up with arresting shots such as the ones featured here. Enjoy and then check out Symmetrical Monsters on Instagram for more. This is certainly a feed to follow for photography enthusiasts.

Schizophrenic Germany

Wingnut German party: Police should be able to shoot migrants
Germany opens first shelter for gay refugees

Bigots Upset Their Daughter Was Taught World History Suing Maryland Public School

Bigots Upset Their Daughter Was Taught World History Suing Maryland Public SchoolTheir reasons are the most ridiculous things you’ll read today for sure.

‘I like my meat tight, tighten up my meat’

Fox News host Steve Doocy, Anna Kooiman and Brian Kilmeade (screen grab)Fox’s Brian Kilmeade baffles co-hosts: ‘I like my meat tight, tighten up my meat’

Utah wingnut sponsors bill declaring porn a ‘public health crisis’

Living in a state that leads the nation in adult film rentals, a Utah wingnut has proposed a bill that would declare pornography a “public health crisis,” and a national epidemic.
This falls under the category of "Someone needs to GET A LIFE in the worst way" 
Worse than Cocaine? Nope t'ain't so!

Palin explodes after ‘Today’ anchors force her to explain why she blamed Obama for son’s arrest

Palin appeared Monday morning on the NBC News program to discuss the Iowa caucuses, where she batted down questions about Dumbass Trump’s religious sincerity and political flip-flopping

Vicious Sandy Hook truther won’t get probation ...

A Sandy Hook “truther” will face a jury after a Connecticut judge rejected his request for a special probation program for allegedly — and repeatedly — harassing a slain teacher’s family.

'Christian' doctrine is causing the Zika virus outbreak to explode

World Health Organization Director-General Dr. Margaret Chan warned last week that the Zika virus “is now spreading explosively” throughout the Americas.

Seminary Student Tries To Get Busy With Infants And Toddlers — Gets Arrested Instead

An Ohio Seminary student, Joel A. Wright was arrested by US Customs and Immigration officials in San Diego after allegedly trying to arrange to have sex with multiple infant victims in Mexico. He is currently charged with two felony counts — crossing state lines with the intention to engage in a sexual act with a minor, and attempting to travel “in interstate and foreign commerce” for the purpose of engaging in illegal sexual conduct with another person, according to a criminal complaint filed in U.S. District Court by the U.S. Attorney’s Office for the Southern District of California.
We know of one vile wingnut troll who we had recently banned from this site that would find this disgusting individual and incident alluring, what with his vividly (and repeatedly) displayed affinity for sexual activities with minors. 
And of course he blames his predilections on others as wingnuts are wont to do.
It had been much more pleasant here since the troll's departure.

Female Cop Halts Sex Offender’s Violent Rampage

Featured image credit: video screen capture from KOB
Poetic justice.

Store owner used improvised flamethrower in bid to deter armed robbers

A quick-thinking store owner in Redland City, Queensland, Australia, launched an attack against two armed robbers with the help of an improvised flamethrower early on Saturday morning.
CCTV video shows the moment Alexandra Hills shop owner Dan Rigney defended himself against two armed men using insect spray and a lighter.
Blasting the bandits with flames, Mr Rigney managed to send the intruders into temporary retreat, one making for the door while the other fell backwards, dropping one of his weapons.
The second attacker, recovering, is then seen standing and aiming his gun directly at Mr Rigney, shouting threats and moving for the cash register. Mr Rigney took the opportunity to flee while the robbers laid aside their weapons and began raiding the till before fleeing with a total of $680. Police are hunting for the attackers.

Miami woman pulls over cop for driving 90 on his way to work ...

A Miami police officer was on the receiving end of “What’s the emergency?” when a woman following him convinced him to pull over after trailing him at speeds up to 90 miles per hour as he zig-zagged in out and out traffic.

Rapist Cop Daniel Holtzclaw Disappears From Prison Database

In December of 2015, a jury found former Oklahoma City police officer Daniel Holtzclaw guilty on 18 counts of sexual assault and rape. A month later, on...

White Chicago cop to sue estate of black teen he killed

A white police officer plans to sue the estate of a black teenager he shot dead because he was traumatized by the fact that he accidentally killed the teen’s neighbor in the incident, his lawyer said.

Policeman's shopping stolen while he chased after shoplifter

An off-duty policeman who tried to catch a supermarket shoplifter had his own shopping stolen while giving chase. PC Graham Thomas was leaving Asda in South Woodham Ferrers, Essex, with his shopping when he saw security guards confronting a man.
When the man ran off, the officer joined the chase, but returned to discover his own bag had been taken."It was annoying, but people will find it amusing and ironic that this has happened to a copper, " he said. PC Thomas said he saw the thief being confronted by Asda security on Wednesday afternoon.
He left his bag of vegetables and hamster treats, along with a case of beer, at the store's customer service desk before joining the chase. The thief got away and when the policeman got back he was told staff had placed his bag in a chiller cabinet, but it was no longer there. When the store's CCTV footage was reviewed later, it turned out a woman had taken it.

"When I got back I was told they'd placed my bag in the chiller, presumably because they didn't know how long I would be gone - although there was nothing that particularly needed keeping cool in it," said PC Thomas, who is based at Chelmsford Police Station. The beer had not been taken and the shop reimbursed him for the rest of his £18 shop, which he had already paid for. Neither thief has been caught.

Butt crack bandit hunted by police

A man whose butt crack was hanging out his shorts was caught on surveillance video robbing two people at gunpoint in Fort Lauderdale, Florida.
A police representative said newly released video of the incident that happened last August shows the man and an accomplice getting out of a vehicle.
He then robbed two people who were hanging out in the area. The men then drove north in what appears to be a white Chrysler 200, detectives said.

Authorities did not immediately disclose what was taken from the victims. Anyone with information about the identities of the robbers is asked to call Fort Lauderdale police.

Motorist who reversed almost three kilometers at 60 kph arrested

A Chinese motorist filmed driving almost 3 kilometers at 60 kph in reverse on Monday has been arrested.
The man was spotted in Nanjing city by another motorist, who noticed the car ahead of him traveling while facing in the wrong direction.
At one point he lowers the camera towards his speedometer, showing he is traveling at 60 kph, nearly 40 mph.

On Saturday, the reversing driver was arrested. He is facing a charge of committing a crime against public security by dangerous means.

Man wearing appropriate T-shirt arrested

A theft suspect in Pennsylvania was wearing a T-shirt declaring he was “Really Good At Making Really Bad Decisions” when he fled from police in a stolen vehicle. Surveillance video caught the moment three police officers surrounded a silver GMC Sierra pick-up truck in the Sheetz parking lot in Baden Borough. Police say 36-year-old Michael Emrick of Ambridge was behind the wheel.

Topless gardener convicted of swindling 73-year-old out of his home

A jury in Boulder, Colorado, have convicted a woman of swindling a half-blind 73-year-old man out of his trailer home after he said he'd give it to her if she agreed to take care of his cat after he died. Catharine Pierce, 58, was found guilty of felony theft and criminal exploitation of an at-risk elder on Wednesday. Pierce gained notoriety in Boulder in 2009 when she was involved in a dispute over her practice of gardening while topless. She faces up to 12 years in prison when she is sentenced on March 18.
According to an arrest warrant affidavit from Boulder police, Pierce and her husband, Robert Pierce, moved in with an elderly man who owned a trailer in Boulder in 2014, staying rent-free for about seven months. Police said the victim in the case told the Pierces that they could have his trailer after he died if they agreed to look after his cat, which he said was the only thing he cared about in the world. While she lived with the victim, Catharine Pierce convinced him to sign what he thought was an agreement to that effect, but he had actually signed over and sold her his trailer for $1, according to police. She later attempted to have him evicted. Catharine Pierce successfully sued the man, who could not attend the court hearing because he was scheduled to have cataract surgery the following day, and a judgment was entered against him to turn over his home. Boulder County Deputy District Attorney Jane Walsh, who prosecuted the case, worked with local law enforcement, court officials and county protective services to block the eviction about a week before it happened. Robert Pierce was not charged, but he has an unrelated assault case still open against him in Boulder County Court.
Boulder police allege he assaulted a Regional Transportation District security guard for telling Catharine Pierce that she could not be topless at the Boulder Transit Center in 2014. District Attorney Stan Garnett said the case was important because it involved the exploitation of an elderly person, and cases like this one are often complex and challenging for prosecutors. "The community should know that if they are concerned about a senior who they know in the family, or a friend or neighbor, who may be a victim of exploitation, the should call Adult Protective Services or my office," Garnett said.

AA Milne and the Curse of Pooh Bear

Author AA Milne wrote seven full-length novels in his life. He also wrote regularly for Punch magazine and was eventually an assistant editor there. Milne also served as the editor of Granta magazine. He wrote five non-fiction books and 34 plays. But Milne is almost solely remembered for the four short children’s books he wrote about his son about a stuffed bear named Winnie the Pooh.
The children’s books added up to just 70,000 words, the length of an average novel. But their enormous fame erased the memory of all the work he’d already done.
The success of the Pooh stories also undermined the reception of the non-juvenile work Milne wrote later. “It seems to me now that if I write anything less realistic, less straightforward than ‘The cat sat on the mat’, I am ‘indulging in a whimsy’,” Milne wrote in the introduction to his play The Ivory Door in 1928. “Indeed if I did say that the cat sat on the mat (as well it might), I should be accused of being whimsical about cats; not a real cat, but just a little make-believe pussy, such as the author of Winnie-the-Pooh invents so charmingly for our delectation.”
Pooh illustrator EH Shepard suffered the same fate, being typecast as a children’s book illustrator, when he’d made his name as a political cartoonist before. But the worst of the typecasting curse fell to Milne’s son Christopher Robin Milne. Read about how Winnie the Pooh followed him around all his life at BBC Culture.

Pet shop staff taught how to give the kiss of life to dogs and cats

Pet shop workers are learning how to give animals the ‘kiss of life’ in a pioneering first aid course. Staff from Pets Corner are being taught CPR for dogs and cats, along with how to save choking and poisoned animals and those injured in road accidents and fights.
The day-long session is the first ever ‘pet and human first aid training course’ in the country, the company said. It is being given to 600 employees across the UK this month. Half a day is devoted to human first aid, while the second half focuses specifically on injured and suffering animals.
Lucy Ross, head of training at Pets Corner, said: “At Pets Corner we have always strived to apply a genuine and ethical approach to everything we do and this includes having the best trained staff in the industry. As well as our human customers we also welcome animals into our stores so it makes sense that our staff’s first aid knowledge extends beyond the standard expectations.
"It’s our mission to provide all of our staff with the tools and knowledge they need to feel confident in helping both pets and people and for our customers to always be in safe hands when they visit any of our shops.” The company, which has over 100 stores nationwide, teamed up with First Aid Support Training and The Canine First Aid Company to develop the specially-tailored course.

Search for American woman whose belongings were dropped onto Liverpool street by a seagull

A Liverpool woman got the shock of her life after a “huge” seagull dropped a pouch containing ID relating to an American woman at her feet.
Ann Hall, 64, who is scared of birds, was walking along when a peculiar package dropped from a seagull’s beak. She said: “I am absolutely terrified of birds and the next thing there was a huge seagull flying towards me and with that it dropped something – it almost dropped at my feet. It was just extraordinary.
“When I inspected it I thought it could be a mobile phone, but it dropped too lightly to be anything terribly heavy. I had a closer look and it was a little pouch. I looked in and there were a lot of credit cards, a driving license and two £20 notes folded up - they belonged to an American lady.”
The pouch, which seemingly belongs to a 46-year-old woman from South Carolina, also contained an entry card to the Hilton Hotel. Ms Hall handed to it into St Anne Street police station at around 4.30 on Friday afternoon. She said: “I said to the policeman, ‘don’t laugh, this is true,’ and he thought it was really funny too.” Ms Hall said police are making efforts to locate the American woman.

Death of woman found with two live monkeys and an incoherent man deemed suspicious

The death of a woman found in a Florida hotel room on Friday afternoon is being investigated as suspicious, city spokesman Josh Taylor said. Linda Marie Smith, 59, of Arcadia was found dead in a room at the Budget Inn in North Port. In addition to her body, two live monkeys were in the hotel room.
Shortly after 1:30pm police announced they were investigating a suspicious death in a room at the hotel. About an hour later the city announced the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission had retrieved two capuchin monkeys from the room. Taylor said the primates were found in carrier crates and were not loose in the room. Taylor said a man was also found in the room.
He was incoherent and received medical attention, and investigators intend to question him further. His identity has not been released. According to Taylor, there was no sign of trauma to Smith's body and a note was also found in the room. The cause of death is undetermined and the medical examiner will perform an autopsy. Capuchin monkeys hail from South America. They are named after Capuchin monks because the dark fur on their heads resembles the priests' headdresses.

Robert Klepper, a FWC spokesman, said capuchin monkeys are considered exotic pets. Florida residents must complete 1,000 hours of training and provide two letters of reference before becoming permitted to own a capuchin monkey. As of October, 2015, there were approximately 45 licensed capuchin monkey owners in Florida, Klepper said. Klepper provided some insight on where the recovered monkeys might be heading next. “Normal protocol would be to place them with a licensed permit holder,” he said. “But I cannot speculate as to whether that's happened yet.”

Animal Pictures