And the other half are lying about it!
by William Rivers Pitt
If I may, I would like to go over some figures with you regarding the
current situation in America. I know numbers are boring and often
perplexing in the main - I was an English Major, so if you put a pistol
to my head and demanded I do long division, the pistol would have a
better chance of coming up with the right answer before you painted the
wall with my literature degree - but these numbers, I think, speak
volumes, and have an unfortunately dramatic bearing on the state of
modern American politics.
Public Policy Polling
did a survey on
the preponderance of belief in conspiracy theories among American
voters, and the results are telling. For example, a question was posed
about whether the respondents believe the Obama administration is coming
to take their guns away, and 62% of repugicans answered "Yes." If you
know five repugicans, that means three of them believe this, and a
fourth has doubts. This, despite the fact that no gun legislation of any
impact whatsoever has shadowed the president's desk since he took
office.
When asked if they believe that Mr. Obama is secretly plotting to
remain in office when his term expires, 44% of repugicans answered
"Yes." If you know five repugicans, that means two of them believe
this, and a third is halfway convinced. This, despite any supporting
evidence whatsoever, and the fact that the man will be arrested and
detained if he tries to enter the White House again after the
inauguration in January of 2017.
When asked if Muslims are working to implement Sharia Law in America -
the harshly medieval seventh-century Islamic code best represented by
the Taliban in Afghanistan, the Wahabists in the ranks of al Qaeda and
(shhhh) a significant portion of the rebels in Syria - 44% of repugicans said it was true. If you know five repugicans, once again,
two of them believe this, and a third is halfway convinced. Um...how?
Where? In what way? Because women can now get free contraception and gay
people have the same rights as you do? You think the Taliban is down
with that?
Is the US government secretly staging "false flag" mass shootings all
across the country in order to blame others and distract the country
from their gun-grabbing, office-staying, Sharia-implementing ways? A
full 26% of repugicans believe this, so if you know five of them, one
is convinced of this, and another is well on his way. I'm sure all the
left-leaning folks who believe that 9/11 was a Cheney-orchestrated
"inside job" are thrilled to know their gospel has been co-opted by
people who think 26 children were massacred in Connecticut so Mr. Obama
could give everyone's guns to the Syrians, because that makes sense,
too, apparently. Or something.
In short, and not to put too fine a point on it: if you know five repugicans, two of them are around-the-bend crazy, and a third needs a
stern talking-to. That's not a majority, but it is pretty much half the
crowd, and is a definite majority every time the crazy two convince the
third to go their way, you know, just in case.
The thing is, those two-and-a-half repugicans you know are energetic
voters, and they throw enormous weight in American politics. Thanks to
the
repugican gerrymandering process of 2010 and
the berserk anti-information "news" bubble dominated by the likes of Lush Dimbulb, Glenn Brick, Michelle Savage, WingNutDaily and the
ceaseless gibberish machine that is Faux News, repugicans in general who
even occasionally look to these outlets for information have been in an
enforced state of flat-out derangement for years and years and years.
The ones who go to the "liberal" news media for "information" are in a
slightly leavened version of the same state, but vote repugican anyway
out of habit and allegiance.
Why do these people swing so much weight in American politics? That's
easy: maybe 55% of the voters in America turn out for presidential
elections, and maybe 30% turn out for the midterm elections, y'know, the
incredibly important elections where a third of the Senate and all 435
seats in the House are up for a vote. That means, come November of 2014,
less than a third of the country will choose all 435 members of the
House, and a sizeable percentage of those voters are flat-out loons in
gerrymandered districts where their impact on Congress is amplified by
orders of magnitude.
Make no mistake about it: these people will vote in 2014, because
they always vote. If it is raining live, ravening, man-eating jaguars
outside, they turn out with strong umbrellas and cast their ballots for
the pro-gun anti-Sharia Jesus-and-fetuses candidate. Because guns, and
Sharia, and they believe everything they've heard and read from their
beloved bedlam news sources.
Why is the government shut down? Because a lot of people don't vote,
but these people did in 2010, like they always do, and the crazy will
elect the crazy every single time and twice
on Sunday, amen.
That's why the government is shut down, and a disastrous default looms, in case you were wondering.