Welcome to ...
The place where the world comes together in honesty and mirth.
Windmills Tilted, Scared Cows Butchered, Lies Skewered on the Lance of Reality ... or something to that effect.
Windmills Tilted, Scared Cows Butchered, Lies Skewered on the Lance of Reality ... or something to that effect.
Sunday, March 12, 2017
Saturday, March 11, 2017
The Daily Drift
Welcome to Today's Edition of
Carolina Naturally
Carolina Naturally
Carolina Naturally is read in 210 countries around the world daily.
Here comes Johnny ... !
Today in History
| 537 | The Goths lay siege to Rome. | |
| 1649 | The peace of Rueil is signed between the Frondeurs (rebels) and the French government. | |
| 1665 | A new legal code is approved for the Dutch and English towns, guaranteeing religious observances unhindered. | |
| 1702 | The Daily Courant, the first regular English newspaper is published. | |
| 1810 | The Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte is married by proxy to Archduchess Marie Louise. | |
| 1811 | Ned Ludd leads a group of workers in a wild protest against mechanization. | |
| 1824 | The U.S. War Department creates the Bureau of Indian Affairs. Seneca Indian Ely Parker becomes the first Indian to lead the Bureau. | |
| 1845 | Seven hundred Maoris led by their chief, Hone-Heke, burn the small town of Kororareka in protest at the settlement of Maoriland by Europeans, in breach with the 1840 Treaty of Waitangi. | |
| 1861 | A Confederate Convention is held in Montgomery, Ala., where the new constitution is adopted. | |
| 1863 | Union troops under General Ulysess S. Grant give up their preparations to take Vicksburg after failing to pass Fort Pemberton, north of Vicksburg. | |
| 1865 | Union General William Sherman and his forces occupy Fayetteville, N.C. | |
| 1888 | A disastrous blizzard hits the northeastern United States. Some 400 people die, mainly from exposure. | |
| 1900 | British Prime Minister Lord Salisbury rejects the peace overtures offered from Boer leader Paul Kruger. | |
| 1905 | The Parisian subway is officially inaugurated. | |
| 1907 | President Teddy Roosevelt induces California to revoke its anti-Japanese legislation. | |
| 1930 | President Howard Taft becomes the first U.S. president to be buried in the National Cemetery in Arlington, Va. | |
| 1935 | The German Air Force becomes an official organ of the Reich. | |
| 1941 | President Franklin D. Roosevelt authorizes the Lend-Lease Act which authorizes the act of giving war supplies to the Allies. | |
| 1942 | General Douglas MacArthur leaves Bataan for Australia. | |
| 1965 | The American navy begins inspecting Vietnamese junks in hopes of ending arms smuggling to the South. | |
| 1966 | Three men are convicted of the murder of Malcolm X. | |
| 1969 | Levi-Strauss starts to sell bell-bottomed jeans. | |
| 1973 | An FBI agent is shot at Wounded Knee in South Dakota. | |
| 1985 | Mikhail Gorbachev is named the new Soviet leader. | |
| 1990 | Lithuania declares its independence from the Soviet Union. |
Americans oppose bathroom laws limiting transgender rights
But, of course the religio-wingnut perverts are still demanding the rest of us be perverts like them and distract us from seeing them doing the exact thing(s) they accuse everyone else of doing.
Hey, religio-wingnuts - it ain't working. We are not distracted nor do we care where anyone goes to the restroom ... JUST WASH YOUR HANDS.
Hey, religio-wingnuts - it ain't working. We are not distracted nor do we care where anyone goes to the restroom ... JUST WASH YOUR HANDS.
10 Things We’ll See in 10 Years
Some people at NASA think we’ll discover alien life by 2025. What will life on Earth be like then?
1. WE’LL FINALLY DISCOVER WHO THE MONA LISA WAS.
The
identity of Mona Lisa has long been a mystery. Some think Leonardo da
Vinci modeled his masterpiece on his mother; others, on a secret male
lover. In fact, one art historian identified her just a few decades
after the painting was completed as Lisa Gherardini del Giocondo, the
wife of a wealthy cloth merchant who commissioned the piece to a
then-broke da Vinci. (The fact that the artist named his work La Gioconda
was a big clue.) Now, thanks to radiocarbon dating, this hunch may
finally be confirmed. Researchers believe they may have found
Gherardini’s remains in a convent in Florence. If the carbon-14 tests
confirm that it’s her, scientists will also do DNA tests to determine
the color of her eyes, skin, and hair. With that information, they’ll
be able to confirm if she is the world’s most famous half-smiler.
2. GROCERY STORE CHECKOUT LINES? ANCIENT HISTORY.
The question “Paper or plastic?” will be a distant memory in the not-so-distant future. The Food Marketing Institute predicts that by 2025, customers will no longer wait in lines to check out at grocery stores. Just like a car zipping through an electronic tollbooth, shoppers will walk out the door and a “frictionless checkout” will automatically account for products in their carts. Also coming soon: stores with moving walls. With a flick of a switch, businesses will be able to change their floor plans and turn into restaurants in the evenings or farmers’ markets on Saturday mornings.
3. THE STRONGEST ROBOTS WILL BE MADE FROM...ONIONS.
The
identity of Mona Lisa has long been a mystery. Some think Leonardo da
Vinci modeled his masterpiece on his mother; others, on a secret male
lover. In fact, one art historian identified her just a few decades
after the painting was completed as Lisa Gherardini del Giocondo, the
wife of a wealthy cloth merchant who commissioned the piece to a
then-broke da Vinci. (The fact that the artist named his work La Gioconda
was a big clue.) Now, thanks to radiocarbon dating, this hunch may
finally be confirmed. Researchers believe they may have found
Gherardini’s remains in a convent in Florence. If the carbon-14 tests
confirm that it’s her, scientists will also do DNA tests to determine
the color of her eyes, skin, and hair. With that information, they’ll
be able to confirm if she is the world’s most famous half-smiler.2. GROCERY STORE CHECKOUT LINES? ANCIENT HISTORY.
The question “Paper or plastic?” will be a distant memory in the not-so-distant future. The Food Marketing Institute predicts that by 2025, customers will no longer wait in lines to check out at grocery stores. Just like a car zipping through an electronic tollbooth, shoppers will walk out the door and a “frictionless checkout” will automatically account for products in their carts. Also coming soon: stores with moving walls. With a flick of a switch, businesses will be able to change their floor plans and turn into restaurants in the evenings or farmers’ markets on Saturday mornings.
Here’s
the thing about today’s robots: They’re wimps. Even the most powerful
can lift only half their weight. Worse, they’re inflexible and their
movements are herky-jerky. But that wouldn’t be the case if we could
outfit them with lightweight, smooth-moving, and super-strong
artificial muscles. In fact, a machine equipped with robo-biceps could
lift 80 times its own weight! The problem is, artificial muscles are
expensive. For years, scientists have been trying to make them with
costly polymers. But in May 2015, researchers at the National Taiwan
University discovered a material so cheap, it literally made them tear
up: onions. When they coated onion cells with gold and zapped them with
electricity, the cells, like human muscles, bent and contracted. Is
it too soon to imagine this sort of technology someday powering robots
that will carry us piggyback to work while reading us the news and
serving us milkshakes?4. THE INTERNET MAY HAVE MET ITS DOOM.
If you need an excuse for spending all afternoon watching mental_floss
on YouTube, here’s one: The Internet could soon be a thing of the past.
If we don’t figure out a way to provide data faster, it could collapse
by 2023, says Andrew Ellis of Aston University’s School of Engineering
and Applied Science. People forget that the Internet is made largely
of fiber-optic cables strung across the ocean floor. Those cables can
keep up with only so much data, and research suggests we could hit a
point where no more information can be crammed into a single fiber. Put
simply, the Internet could get full. The repercussions: spotty service
or providers installing more cables, sending Internet prices
skyrocketing. And if you think the industry or the government is
prepared, you’re wrong. According to engineer and industry pioneer Danny
Hillis, “There is no plan B.”
5. WE’LL FIGURE OUT IF SHAKESPEARE WAS A STONER ...
In
2012, archaeologists dug up the remains of King Richard III. Laser
scans and analysis taught scientists and historians more about the
15th-century ruler than they ever imagined, revealing how he died as
well as clues about his lifestyle and diet (he enjoyed peacock and
swan). Academics like Francis Thackeray of the University of the
Witwatersrand in Johannesburg are hoping to perform the same techniques
on Shakespeare’s bones. An analysis could unearth secrets about the
Bard’s own death, diet, and health—and whether he smoked weed. In 2001,
fragments of clay pipes containing traces of cannabis were discovered
in Shakespeare’s garden. (Hemp was used for rope and clothing in the
Elizabethan era, so it follows that some of the plant was used for
medicine and pleasure.) Of course, researchers may have trouble digging
him up. Shakespeare’s epitaph reads: "Bleste be the man that spares
thes stones, and curst be he that moves my bones."6. ...AND POT COULD BECOME A LEGAL, LUCRATIVE CAREER.
By
2020, legal marijuana could be a $35 billion industry in the U.S. A
study by ArcView Market Research suggests that as many as 18 states
could legalize recreational pot use, while nearly twice that may
legalize it for medical use. And that means jobs! The current medical
and leisure industry—worth about $3 billion—employs between 46,000 and
60,000 people. That number is only going to get, well, higher. From
horticulturalists to procurement officers to dispensary owners, the
number of positions that could grow out of a prospering pot industry
could make marijuana one of the hottest job prospects for college grads
(at least the ones who can muster the will to get off their beanbag
chairs).7. WE’LL BE FLYING ON FUNGUS.
Those leaves you rake every fall may fuel your vacation. Researchers at Washington State University have discovered that under certain conditions, a black fungus named Aspergillus carbonarius ITEM 5010—which thrives in decaying leaves, soil, and fruit—can be used to create hydrocarbons that could help make jet fuel, which is a blend of petroleum products. (Intriguingly, the fungus creates the most hydrocarbons when it munches on oatmeal.) Not only would this be cost-effective, it would also eliminate the need for complex chemical processes used to make fuels, since the fungus does the work itself. Researchers hope Aspergillus carbonarius will start to fuel flights within the next five years.
8. WE WILL HAVE SURVIVED YET ANOTHER CICADA PLAGUE.
Since biblical times, we’ve been periodically visited by swarms of winged creatures emerging like zombies from the ground. In modern America, the most loathsome of these is a gang of cicadas known as Brood X. Its members are living underground right now sucking on tasty tree roots, but in 2021, after 17 years underfoot, the critters will claw out of the dirt to breed. Brood X will be so big that, in the Northeast, there could be 1.5 million cicadas for every acre—and they will be singing love songs for weeks. The invasion won’t be a threat to crops, but stock up on earplugs: A treeful of buzzing cicadas can top 100 decibels.
9. ART’S MOST TRAGICOMIC MEME WILL BE ERASED.
In 2012, 81-year-old Cecilia Gimenez tried to restore Ecce Homo, a 19th-century fresco in her church in Borja, Spain. The result was less than seamless. “Beast Jesus,” as it’s now called, looked more like “a crayon sketch of a very hairy monkey in an ill-fitting tunic” than Jesus wearing a crown of thorns, said the BBC’s Christian Fraser. But the mistake was a blessing in disguise, bringing in more than 150,000 tourists, who each paid a euro to view the Beast. Art historians want to restore it, and one conservator says solvents could remove the paint job in minutes, but the church may let the tourist dollars continue to roll in. Nevertheless, once the meme becomes a thing of the past (perhaps when the Internet collapses?), Ecce Homo will live again.
10. DARK MATTER WILL BE EXPOSED.
Being an astrophysicist is a bit of a grind: Folks studying the cosmos are absorbed by a universe of equations and formulas, but they don’t often get a chance to test them out—the universe is too darn vast. But that’s going to change. By 2024, a powerful radio telescope (basically, a field of dishes and antennas) will help answer the biggest questions plaguing Earth’s biggest brains. The Square Kilometre Array, located in South Africa and Western Australia, will be the world’s fastest, largest radio telescope—and the closest thing we have to a time machine. With it, scientists will peer back billions of years to observe the first black holes, stars, and galaxies. But that’s not all: It will become our greatest tool in the search for alien life, and test Einstein’s general theory of relativity—that is, our understanding of how time and gravity work. We’ll map billions of galaxies extending to the edge of the observable universe. Most exciting, it will help scientists identify dark matter, the enigmatic material composing 85 percent of our universe.
Magic May Not Be Real, But This School of Witchcraft Sure Is
Do
you feel like you would have made a great witch or wizard if you just
got that damned Hogwarts acceptance letter? Well good news! The Bothwell School of Witchcraft is
now enrolling for a short, weekend-long course in August. Classes will
take place in the Herstmoncuex castle in East Sussex and aside from
teaching guests potions and necromancy, the school will also help
students solve a murder mystery -which they obviously know about in
advance thanks to the ancient art of divination.You can learn more about the program on their website.
Smithsonian Scientists Retrace the Mysterious Circumstances of an 1866 Death
Robert
Kennicott was a well-liked and respected young naturalist for the
Smithsonian Institution in its early days, when naturalists actually
lived in the museum together. He was dedicated to collecting specimens
for the institute, up until his untimely death at age 30. Kennicott's
bones will be put on display at the Smithsonian’s National Museum of
Natural History on March 10 as part of an exhibit called “Objects of
Wonder.” For Kennicott, that might be the ultimate honor. But his story
did not end with his death. Over a hundred years after burial,
Kennicott's coffin was exhumed for examination to determine the exact
cause of death.
The mystery begins with Kennicott’s death on May 13, 1866. He had been on another long mission to the Yukon—this time for the Western Union Telegraph. He was the only person who had lived in Russian America, and was to help that company find a route to lay a cable connecting the United States with Europe via the Bering Strait. Kennicott and two fellow naturalists also planned to collect rare specimens, but they arrived just below the Arctic Circle as winter began in 1865. They made a grueling trip to Fort Nulato on the Yukon River, 500 miles from any other fort, in temperatures as low as 60 below zero.Kennicott's family never really bought the idea that he had committed suicide. In 2001, forensic anthropologist Kari Bruwelheide and the museum’s division head for physical anthropology Doug Owsley performed a thorough examination and a chemical analysis to find out why he died. In analyzing Kennicott's remains, they also got a glimpse at the chemicals that 19th century people were exposed to, both accidentally and medicinally (such as lead, strychnine, and mercury), and the effects of diseases that were common at the time. Read the story of Robert Kennicott at Smithsonian.
By spring, Kennicott intended to begin his own work as a naturalist. But he didn’t show up for breakfast that day, and his men found him dead by the bank of the river near the fort. Rumors began that he had committed suicide by swallowing the strychnine he often carried to preserve specimens. His friends spent eight months on a journey to bring Kennicott’s body back. He was buried in January 1867 at The Grove, in an airtight metal coffin.
The Men Who Volunteered to Be Poisoned by the Government
Harvey
Washington Wiley of the U.S. Department of Agriculture's Bureau of
Chemistry was concerned about the unrestricted contents of food that
Americans were buying. So when he sent out a call for volunteers, 12
young men, mostly poorly-paid clerks, answered the call. They must have
been hungry, because they didn't run for the hills as soon as they found
out what kind of six-month experiment they'd signed up for.
The results of those experiments led to the Pure Food and Drug Act and the Meat Inspection Act in 1906. The experiments lasted for five years, although the squad of volunteers changed. Read what those young men went through in the name of science and safety at mental_floss.Wiley’s staff would put borax in their butter, milk, or coffee. Formaldehyde would lurk in their meats, copper sulfate and saltpeter in their fruit pies. Wiley would begin at low doses and then ratchet up the amount until one or more of the men complained of debilitating symptoms, like vomiting or dizziness. Those people would then be excused from the program until they felt well enough to resume. In the event a subject died or became seriously ill, he would waive the right to pursue legal remedy against the government.
The year was 1902. With funding and consent from Congress, Wiley was about to embark on an experiment he dubbed the “hygienic table trials,” but it was the Washington news media that came up with the nickname that would stick: They called his volunteers "the Poison Squad."
The Candy Thief
Futility
Closet gives us a crime scene and a logic puzzle to solve it. Five
children go into a candy store, and one of them steals a box of candy.
Let's assume that none of them have chocolate on their faces, and the
stolen box is not in their possession at the moment. Each of the five
children gives a statement of three sentences.
Ivan:Okay, the clue is that each child told the truth in two sentences and lied in one sentence. Who stole the candy? Don't let the fact that there are 15 sentences deter you; it's not that difficult when you get into it. When you come to an answer or give up, see the explanation at Futility Closet.
1. I didn’t take the box of candy.
2. I have never stolen anything.
3. Dennis did it.
Sylvia:
4. I didn’t take the box of candy.
5. I’m rich and I can buy my own candy.
6. Linda knows who the crook is.
Ernie:
7. I didn’t take the box of candy.
8. I didn’t know Linda until this year.
9. Dennis did it.
Dennis:
10. I didn’t take the box of candy.
11. Linda did it.
12. Ivan is lying when he says I stole the candy.
Linda:
13. I didn’t take the box of candy.
14. Sylvia is guilty.
15. Ernie can vouch for me, because he has known me since I was a baby eight years ago.
Sex party priests and prostitution rock the catholic cult
An ungodly scandal is erupting across
various parishes as priests have been accused of engaging in orgies,
porn, and sex parties.
Friday, March 10, 2017
The Daily Drift
Welcome to Today's Edition of
Carolina Naturally
Carolina Naturally
Carolina Naturally is read in 210 countries around the world daily.
Piper ... !
Today in History
| 515 BC | The building of the great Jewish temple in Jerusalem is completed. | |
| 241 BC | The Roman fleet sinks 50 Carthaginian ships in the Battle of Aegusa. | |
| 49 BC | Julius Caesar crosses the Rubicon and invades Italy. | |
| 1656 | In the colony of Virginia, suffrage is extended to all free men regardless of their religion. | |
| 1776 | “Common Sense” by Thomas Paine is published. | |
| 1785 | Thomas Jefferson is appointed minister to France. | |
| 1806 | The Dutch in Cape Town, South Africa surrender to the British. | |
| 1814 | Napoleon Bonaparte is defeated by an allied army at the Battle of Laon, France. | |
| 1848 | The treaty of Guadeloupe-Hidalgo is signed which ends the United States’ war with Mexico. | |
| 1876 | Alexander Graham Bell makes the first telephone call to Thomas Watson saying “Watson, come here. I need you.” | |
| 1893 | New Mexico State University cancels its first graduation ceremony, because the only graduate was robbed and killed the night before. | |
| 1902 | The Boers of South Africa score their last victory over the British, capturing British General Methuen and 200 men. | |
| 1910 | Slavery is abolished in China. | |
| 1924 | The U.S. Supreme Court upholds a New York state law forbidding late-night work for women. | |
| 1927 | Prussia lifts its Nazi ban, Adolf Hitler is allowed to speak in public. | |
| 1933 | Nevada becomes the first U.S. state to regulate drugs. | |
| 1941 | Vichy France threatens to use its navy unless Britain allows food to reach France. | |
| 1943 | Adolf Hitler calls Field Marshall Erwin Rommel back from Tunisia in North Africa. | |
| 1944 | The Irish refuse to oust all Axis envoys and deny the accusation of spying on Allied troops. | |
| 1945 | American B-29 bombers attack Tokyo, killing 100,000. | |
| 1947 | The Big Four meet in Moscow to discuss the future of Germany. | |
| 1948 | Author Zelda Fitzgerald (wife of F. Scott) dies in a fire at Highland Hospital. | |
| 1953 | North Korean gunners at Wonsan fire on the USS Missouri, the ship responds by firing 998 rounds at the enemy position. | |
| 1954 | President Dwight Eisenhower calls Senator Joseph McCarthy a peril to the wingnut cabal. | |
| 1966 | The North Vietnamese capture a Green Beret camp at Ashau Valley. | |
| 1969 | James Earl Ray pleads guilty to the murder of Dr. Martin Luther King and is sentenced to 99 years in jail. | |
| 1971 | The Senate approves a Constitutional amendment to lower the voting age to 18. | |
| 1975 | The North Vietnamese Army attacks the South Vietnamese town of Buon Ma Thout, the offensive will end with total victory in Vietnam. | |
| 1980 | Iran’s leader, Ayatollah Khomeini, lends his support to the militants holding the American hostages in Tehran. | |
| 1982 | The United States bans Libyan oil imports, because of the continued support of terrorism. | |
| 1987 | The Vatican condemns surrogate parenting as well as test-tube and artificial insemination. |
We’re Spending $30 Million For Melania To Live In NYC
Taxpayers
are footing the bill to the tune of an estimated $30
million for Melania Trump to live in New York City, while the Dumbass'
federal hiring freeze is causing the military to close down
child care programs.…
No evidence immigrants displacing U.S. workers
A
new study from Sonoma State University shows no evidence for immigrants
displacing American citizens in the workforce. “Empirically, I don’t
see any evidence that immigrants are going to take our jobs or decrease
our … Read more
Burger's Bun Is Made From Fried Brie
Some
days you want to diet and some days you just want to eat yourself to
death. When you want to watch your body's whole world burn, there is the
EatFamous Burger from Holy Chuck Bugers.
This marvelous monstrosity takes two full wheels of brie, breads and
deep fries them and then uses them as buns for an already over-the-top
burger that features four burger patties, eight strips of bacon, four
slices of aged cheddar and a fried egg on top.Of course eating this beast isn't just difficult due to all the calories, but also because those two gooey cheese buns don't exactly make it easy to pick up and chow down. But a mess is a small price to pay for something this ooey-gooey good.
Lady of the Lake
The Sunken B-29 Superfortress of Eielson AFB
Eielson
Air Force Base in Alaska has a strange piece of history in a pond at
the end of a runway. A Boeing B-29 Superfortress has been sitting there
in the water for at least 60 years, where it's earned the nickname the
Lady of the Lake.However, a recent underwater survey has unearthed details about the plane leading to its exact identity, and it turns out to have quite an interesting history. You'll want to read that story, and see more pictures of the Lady of the Lake at Urban Ghosts.For decades, all that was visible of the sunken B-29 from the roadside was the starboard wing, the distinctive metal lattice of the cockpit and the tip of the vertical stabiliser. The latter is adorned with faded bumper stickers and pockmarked by modern bullet holes, reminders that the Lady of the Lake may be abandoned, but isn’t forgotten.
For years, it’s been widely held that Eielson’s last Superfortress was dragged to the its watery resting place in the 1950s for use in aircrew evacuation drills. But its role as a crash rescue trainer eventually came to an end when the airframe sank deeper into the mud, becoming dangerous. After that, the enigmatic B-29 was abandoned where it lay.
Firefighters Rescue Same Dog Twice in One Hour
Firefighters
in Nanticoke City, Pennsylvania, were called to a home last week over a
report there was a dog on the roof. A husky inside the second floor had
managed to open a window, popped out the screen, and went outside on
the slanted porch roof. His owner was not at home. A firefighter climbed
to the roof and got the dog back inside, then closed the window. But that wasn't the end of the story.
About an hour later, firefighters received another public assist call to same location for the dog on the roof. The dog apparently wanted to be back outside again and reopened the window and let himself out again.That's one determined pooch! So they got the ladder out again and a firefighter once again got the dog back inside. This time, they made sure the window was secure. -Thanks, John Farrier!
Animals No Longer on the Endangered Species List
If
you follow news on endangered species, it can get pretty depressing to
see so many animals facing extinction. But not all news about endangered
animals is bad news. In fact, on TopTenz,
you can read about 10 animals who have been removed from the endangered
species list -including the panda that has served as an icon for
conservation of endangered species since the WWF chose the bear as their
icon in 1961. And while we so often hear about poachers decimating
rhino populations in Africa, their cousins in India have also been taken
off the endangered species list in the last decade.
There might
still be a lot of animals that need our help out there, but articles
like this are a reminder that we can make a difference and bring animal
populations back from the brink. So see the whole list over at TopTenz.
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