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The place where the world comes together in honesty and mirth.
Windmills Tilted, Scared Cows Butchered, Lies Skewered on the Lance of Reality ... or something to that effect.
Windmills Tilted, Scared Cows Butchered, Lies Skewered on the Lance of Reality ... or something to that effect.
Friday, October 9, 2015
Man who tried to open plane door at 30,000ft thinking it was the toilet banned by airline
A hapless passenger has been banned from flying with a major airline for
five years after he mistook a jet’s outside door for the toilet.
James Gray said airline staff accused him of trying to open the door of
the plane he was on while traveling at 30,000ft.
However, he claims he only touched the handle after confusing it for the
door to the toilet.
James, from Alloa, Scotland, was marched off the KLM flight from Edinburgh to Amsterdam the moment it touched down at Schiphol Airport. He was then whisked away to a nearby detention center where he spent the night before he was fined £434 (600 euros). But when he went to fly home he said KLM staff refused to let him board and said he was banned from flying with them for five years. He only made it back after a pal paid for him to travel with a rival airline.
James said: “The crew told me to stay in my seat and I was to be arrested when the plane landed.
I tried to explain it was a simple mistake.
It was a misunderstanding.
The police came and arrested me.
They weren’t too friendly.”
James claims he spoke to a translator by phone as he was being interviewed by Dutch police officers.
He also had to borrow money after the fine wiped out his holiday funds.
He said: “I was charged and fined 600 euros."I only had 750 euros with me so I had to borrow money for the rest of the stay over there.” James said he doesn’t know if he will face any further action over the incident but is adamant he wouldn’t dream of opening a plane door on purpose. “I realize the danger of that sort of thing,” he added. A spokeswoman for Schiphol Airport and a spokesperson for the Royal Dutch Border Police both refused to comment. KLM said a passenger had been handed over to authorities due to “his misbehavior” on-board.
Man avoids jail after dry humping woman who complained that he'd urinated over toilet seat
A man “dry humped” a woman after she complained that he had urinated over the toilet seat, a court heard.
Oliver Johns, aged 24, sexually assaulted her when she asked him to clean up.
Johns also made an indecent suggestion, Plymouth Crown Court heard.
A judge said it was not necessary to send him to prison because he had apologized to the woman by text.
Johns, of Greenbank, Devon, admitted sexual assault on May 15.
He also pleaded guilty to causing criminal damage when he punched a door two days later.
Kelly Scrivener, for the Crown Prosecution Service, said Johns had used a communal lavatory.
She added the woman had asked him to clean up because he had urinated over the seat. Miss Scrivener said Johns exposed himself, made an indecent suggestion and grabbed the woman’s hand. She added they had fallen to the floor and he had “dry humped” her. The court heard that the offense put Johns in breach of a conditional discharge for possession of cannabis imposed two months before.
Recorder Lawrie cut across the defense barrister to say he would follow a recommendation in the probation report. He told Johns: “You were in drink or under the influence of something. You duly apologized. This could have been dealt with by a significant custodial sentence.” He handed the defendant an 11-month community order with probation’s Rehabilitation Activity Requirement. He must also pay £900 criminal court charge and £60 victim surcharge.
She added the woman had asked him to clean up because he had urinated over the seat. Miss Scrivener said Johns exposed himself, made an indecent suggestion and grabbed the woman’s hand. She added they had fallen to the floor and he had “dry humped” her. The court heard that the offense put Johns in breach of a conditional discharge for possession of cannabis imposed two months before.
Recorder Lawrie cut across the defense barrister to say he would follow a recommendation in the probation report. He told Johns: “You were in drink or under the influence of something. You duly apologized. This could have been dealt with by a significant custodial sentence.” He handed the defendant an 11-month community order with probation’s Rehabilitation Activity Requirement. He must also pay £900 criminal court charge and £60 victim surcharge.
Police hunt woman who stole large pink piggy bank from hotel

Police in the Sunbury suburb of Melbourne, Australia, are appealing for
public assistance to identify a woman who stole a large pink piggy bank
from a hotel last week.
The incident happened at the Sunbury Hotel when the woman approached the
cashier’s office on Wednesday 23 September just before 12.30pm.
No one was in the office and the woman was seen on CCTV moving the large pink piggy bank across the counter, closer to the window. The woman then threw a black jacket over the piggy bank, lifted it from the counter and walked away.
The large pink piggy bank collects donations for terminally ill children and their families. The woman is perceived to be Caucasian, aged in her 30s, with brown hair and a medium build. Investigators have released images of the woman they believe may be able to assist them with their inquiry.
No one was in the office and the woman was seen on CCTV moving the large pink piggy bank across the counter, closer to the window. The woman then threw a black jacket over the piggy bank, lifted it from the counter and walked away.
The large pink piggy bank collects donations for terminally ill children and their families. The woman is perceived to be Caucasian, aged in her 30s, with brown hair and a medium build. Investigators have released images of the woman they believe may be able to assist them with their inquiry.
Woman fined after recreating Psycho knife scene in prank to give neighbour a fright
A mother-of-two who tried to give her friend a fright by recreating a
knife-wielding scene from the film Psycho has been fined more than £400.
Lisa Peck knocked on her neighbors door holding a black kitchen knife
to scare her.
Colchester Magistrates’ Court heard Alfred Hitchcock’s 1960 classic
Psycho is the favorite film of Peck and her pal.
However, another neighbor spotted her through her front window and
called the police.
When they arrived, Peck, 36, of Colchester, Essex, was back in her home,
but when they searched the house they found a knife on the floor in her
hall and she was arrested.
Peck admitted possessing an offensive weapon in public when she appeared
at Colchester Magistrates' Court.
Lesla Small, prosecuting said: “Miss Peck said she thought it would be
funny to knock on the door and give her friend a bit of a fright.”
James O'Toole, mitigating, said Peck is extremely remorseful and was under considerable pressure at the time because her two teenage children had moved back in with her after living with their father. He said: “For whatever reason, it came into her head to re-enact a scene from their favorite film, Psycho. It was absolutely stupid and foolish beyond belief. She had absolutely no intention of using the knife and she knows it was absolutely stupid.”
The court heard Peck is a binge drinker rather than someone who has habitual trouble with alcohol. She admitted to being drunk at the time of the incident. Robert Clubb, chairman of the bench, said he accepted Peck’s excuse but added: “The court takes a pretty dim view of someone rushing around with a knife in a public place. However, we are minded to view this in the lowest level of this particular offense.” Peck was ordered to pay £405.
James O'Toole, mitigating, said Peck is extremely remorseful and was under considerable pressure at the time because her two teenage children had moved back in with her after living with their father. He said: “For whatever reason, it came into her head to re-enact a scene from their favorite film, Psycho. It was absolutely stupid and foolish beyond belief. She had absolutely no intention of using the knife and she knows it was absolutely stupid.”
The court heard Peck is a binge drinker rather than someone who has habitual trouble with alcohol. She admitted to being drunk at the time of the incident. Robert Clubb, chairman of the bench, said he accepted Peck’s excuse but added: “The court takes a pretty dim view of someone rushing around with a knife in a public place. However, we are minded to view this in the lowest level of this particular offense.” Peck was ordered to pay £405.
Irate lady kicked woman in the face after victim farted near her
As she was being transported to jail, a Florida woman became “irate” and
kicked another female detainee in the face after the victim “‘farted’
near her,” police allege.
Jeanelle Callahan, 48, was arrested on Thursday afternoon after she
punched her male roommate in the face, according to an arrest affidavit.
Callahan, who was reportedly “highly intoxicated,” left the man with a
bloody nose.
Following that arrest, Callahan was placed into a jail transport, where
she encountered Virginia Turner, 60, who had been arrested for
trespassing. Both women were handcuffed in the police vehicle.
En route to the county lockup, “the suspect claimed that Virginia Turner ‘farted’ near her,” reported Officer Stephen Zulauf. Callahan became “irate” and attempted to strike Turner in the face with her elbow. Callahan then “raised her right leg and kicked Virginia Turner’s right side of her face.”
Turner did not fight back during the attack, which was recorded by the vehicle’s camera system. Callahan, who was already facing a battery charge for punching her roommate, was then charged with a second battery count for attacking Turner. Callahan is locked up in the county jail on $1,000 bond.
En route to the county lockup, “the suspect claimed that Virginia Turner ‘farted’ near her,” reported Officer Stephen Zulauf. Callahan became “irate” and attempted to strike Turner in the face with her elbow. Callahan then “raised her right leg and kicked Virginia Turner’s right side of her face.”
Turner did not fight back during the attack, which was recorded by the vehicle’s camera system. Callahan, who was already facing a battery charge for punching her roommate, was then charged with a second battery count for attacking Turner. Callahan is locked up in the county jail on $1,000 bond.
How French Artists in 1899 Envisioned Life in the Year 2000

In 1899, 1900, 1901 and 1910, French artists Jean-Marc Côté and other of his contemporaries prepared these illustrations of what life in France would be like in the year 2000. Initially they were printed on paper cards placed in cigarette and cigar boxes; later they were used as artwork on post cards. The first series was created exclusively for the 1900 World Exhibition in Paris.
Some of these now whimsical drawings come close to actual inventions that appeared in future years. Others are simply amusing in their fanciful ideas, such as the "whale bus."
See a collection of these drawings at The Public Domain Review. Via Open Culture


Hear the World
Our ancestors apparently had a lot to say 2 million years ago, even if they said it quietly.
Mummy's Kidney
The mummy dates back to some 2,800 years and his kidney was preserved thanks to end-stage renal tuberculosis.
Fossil Michigan
The 93-pound Petoskey stone is a reminder of the state's ancient history as a warm sea.
Martian Water
Animal News
These cold-blooded behemoths would be ranked contenders in any ring.
The announcement was welcomed by conservationists, who,
citing its detrimental impact on wildlife, have long been pushing for an
all-out ban.
Viruses have just joined the tree of life in a dramatic way -- they even predate modern cells.
A new way of drinking has just been discovered, providing certain bats with a quirky claim to animal fame.
Dog Gently Covers Sleeping Baby

Papa
Dog loves his puppy, even though he's not blood kin. It takes a pack to
raise one, you know. So he makes sure that the vulnerable infant stays
warm while napping.
This Monkey Looks Like Wolverine

But wait--Marvel apparently already has! Now it's time for Marvel Apes to be a movie trilogy.
Zoo meerkat-keeper glassed monkey-keeper in the face over love rival llama-keeper
A London zoo love triangle between keepers of meerkats, monkeys and
llamas led to bloody fight at a Christmas party, a court has heard.
Caroline Westlake, who worked in the meerkat enclosure, was convicted on
Friday of assault by beating after glassing her colleague, Kate
Sanders, in the face.
Sanders, who cared for the attraction’s monkeys, and Westlake came to blows in the zoo’s Prince Albert Suite after a row over llama-keeper Adam Davies, who dated Sanders for five years but after they split started a relationship with Westlake. Sanders saw the couple together for the first time at the Christmas party on 8 December and made a derisory comment about Westlake’s appearance. Her comments sparked an argument that ended with Sanders being struck in the face with a wine glass, for which she required stitches.
Westlake, from Banstead in Surrey, denied one count of assault by
beating but was found guilty at Westminster magistrates court. The
30-year-old, who worked at the zoo for four and a half years, was sacked
from her job looking after the meerkats and the rainforest zone.
Sanders, from north London, was given a final warning and banned from
Zoological Society of London events for two years as a result of the
fight.
Sanders earlier told the court of her shock when blood came pouring out
of her mouth during the fight. “Things were being said on both sides
that shouldn’t have been said,” she said.
“I told her I’d seen a text she sent him asking him out for a
drink
while we were still dating and the next thing I know I was hit in the
face with something very hard.
I was hit on the left cheek and from the feeling it was a glass and had
come from a low position. I was extremely shocked when it hit me. I
tried to protect myself by reaching out my right hand and pushing her
against the nearest thing to me, which was some railings.” Defense
solicitor Suzanne Kelly told Sanders it was she who instigated
the fight with Westlake by punching her in the face, lunging at her and
pushing her over nearby railings, which she denied.
Westlake is to be sentenced on 14 October.
Thursday, October 8, 2015
The Daily Drift
Welcome to the Thursday Edition of Carolina Naturally.
~ Anita Purvis
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Today in History
| 876 | Charles the Bald is defeated at the Battle of Andernach. | |
| 1690 | Belgrade is retaken by the Turks. | |
| 1840 | King William I of Holland abdicates. | |
| 1855 | Arrow, a ship flying the British flag, is boarded by Chinese who arrest the crew, thus beginning the Second Chinese War. | |
| 1862 | The Union is victorious at the Battle of Perryville, the largest Civil War combat to take place in Kentucky. | |
| 1871 | The Great Chicago Fire begins in southwest Chicago, possibly in a barn owned by Patrick and Katherine O’Leary. Fanned by strong southwesterly winds, the flames raged for more than 24 hours, eventually leveling three and a half square miles and wiping out one-third of the city. Approximately 250 people were killed in the fire; 98,500 people were left homeless; 17,450 buildings were destroyed. | |
| 1897 | Journalist Charles Henry Dow, founder of the Wall Street Journal, begins charting trends of stocks and bonds. | |
| 1900 | Maximilian Harden is sentenced to six months in prison for publishing an article critical of the German Kaiser. | |
| 1906 | Karl Ludwig Nessler first demonstrates a machine in London that puts permenant waves in hair. The client wears a dozen brass curlers, each wearing two pounds, for the six-hour process. | |
| 1912 | First Balkan War begins as Montenegro declares war against the Ottoman Empire. | |
| 1918 | US Army corporal Alvin C. York kills 28 German soldiers and captures 132 in the Argonne Forest; promoted to sergeant and awarded US Medal of Honor and French Croix de Guerre. | |
| 1919 | The U.S. Senate and House of Representatives pass the Volstead Prohibition Enforcement Bill. | |
| 1921 | First live radio broadcast of a football game; Harold W. Arlin was the announcer when KDKA of Pittsburgh broadcast live from Forbes Field as the University of Pittsburgh beat West Virginia University 21–13. | |
| 1922 | Lilian Gatlin becomes the first woman pilot to fly across the United States. | |
| 1932 | Indian Air Force established. | |
| 1939 | Nazi Germany annexes Western Poland. | |
| 1956 | Don Larsen of the New York Yankees pitches the first perfect game in World Series history against the Brooklyn Dodgers. | |
| 1967 | Guerrilla Che Guevara captured in Bolivia. | |
| 1968 | U.S. forces in Vietnam launch Operation SEALORDS (South East Asia Lake, Ocean, River and Delta Strategy), an attack on communist supply lines and base areas in and around the Mekong Delta. | |
| 1969 | The "Days of Rage" begin in Chicago; the Weathermen faction of the Students for a Democratic Society initiate 3 days of violent antiwar protests. | |
| 1973 | In the Yom Kippur War an Israeli armored brigade makes an unsuccessful attack on Egyptian positions on the Israeli side of the Suez Canal. | |
| 1978 | Ken Warby of Australia sets the world water speed record, 317.60 mph, at Blowering Dam in Australia; no other human has yet (2013) exceeded 300 mph on water and survived. | |
| 1982 | The musical Cats begins a run of nearly 18 years on Broadway. | |
| 1991 | Croatia votes to sever its ties with Yugoslavia. | |
| 2001 | The shrub fabricates the Office of Homeland Security. |
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