Fortune Cookie Say ...

That might just be a wee bit to a Fortune Cookie and its "fortune" for you, because in the last 3 weeks each time I haven eaten at the "Great Wok" I have received the same fortune (and you cannot tell me that it is not against the odds, even if there only 10 "fortunes" and each one repeated 100 times in a case of cookies, the odds of my receiving the same one every time I go into the place are almost nill, what with the volume of business the place does.).

What is that "fortune" you ask?

Well, I don't think it is so much a "fortune" but a comment on my character ...

For the last 5 times I have received the following:

You have inexhaustible wisdom and power!

It's true, I do! (And a keen sense of self depreciating humor to go along with it!)

Maybe it's time for a second honeymoon?

Funny thing is I was thinking about just such a thing when I ran across this cartoon!
The second honeymoon part ... not the "with who" part.

Enough

It's time to take the coats and hats off and get down to business!

Busy Day

It has been a busy day so far and I am glad I am on "vacation" now. Helping my friend out at his butcher shop is hard work and starting to cut steaks at 6AM is insane ... by noon you are wore out. But today was my day to be insane and start cutting steaks at 6AM. This is after I had taken care of the animals on the farm. Now a massive thunderstorm is just finishing ... I think ... there is a second set of rumbling thunder rolling in behind the set leaving. We'll see, but at damn near 100 degrees any cooling is welcomed.

Morning Funny

Never eat more than you can lift.

Gratuitous Attitude

Random Thoughts

Have you ever noticed the vibrant colors and crisp sounds after a thunderstorm?

Why is it that two twentysomethings don't know and much as one fortysomething?

If we know the speed of light, then why hasn't the speed of dark been calculated?

Why are Yellow Freight trucks painted orange?

Why is it when a woman is caught unawares naked she always covers her eyes and breasts first?

Which smells better ... fresh cut grass or fresh turned earth?

Which really did come first ... the chicken or the egg?

Why is space so big?

Why do they call it "choking the chicken"?

Night Funny

A vacation is what you take when you can't take what you've been taking any longer!

The Upper Crust

The upper crust are those high society people we read about. The get their label from the ancient etiquette rule that granted the flavored top crust of a loaf of bread to the king or senior-ranked person at the table.

Top crust bah, I want the whole loaf!

Daily Funny

Gun Nuts

Why is it that those who do not understand the law are forever screaming about 'their rights'?

Case in point ... those who rant and rave about their right to own any gun they want because the 2nd Amendment to the Constitution says so.

It doesn't, but that fact seems to elude their cognitive awareness .

Last evening on another forum there was a raging tirade all evening long from the 'gun nuts' who completely missed the point time and again and disrupted the discussion being held by those that actually do know what the 2nd Amendment says and means ... and who had quite a humorous exchange going to boot.

They howled that "we were trying to take their guns away from them". That was not the discussion, but as I have thought on it, maybe those howling such drivel should have no access to firearms as their ravings indicate a serious lack of reasoning ... and as the Constitution requires regulation of "arms" it would behoove us to remove the possibility of those ranters to be able to use something that is and can be very harmful when their demonstrated lack of discernment has already proven their inability to use them.

Part of the non-ranting discussion was about forming a national education and training organization in the use of firearms (something the NRA was originally formed for and was, that is until it became the Cult it is now). This is a good idea. How to get it started is the biggest hurdle and to insure it doesn't morph into a cult like the NRA has.

So to all you gun nuts out there, the more you howl about 'your rights' which don't exist except in your fevered imaginations, the more you push reasonable people to consider to further regulate firearms to the point of you being unable to own one. Because those that cannot reason are barred from gun ownership now and all it would take is for you to be declared unfit due to lack of reasoning ability (read: mentally disturbed), and your ' imagined right' as well as your privilege of firearms ownership will vanish right before your eyes.

Morning Funny

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet!

Night Funny

The best way to keep your kids out of hot water is to put some dishes into it.

Snippets

Just thought I'd share some conversational exchanges between our 7 year-old granddaughter "G" and her 12 year-old brother "J". These are actual exchanges from the last week that they have been staying with us.

*****

G: "Bubbie, does Daddy have boy parts?"

J: "No, he has MAN parts. G."

G: "What's the difference Bubbie?"

J: "Several inches."

(This one came out of left field somewhere as they were watching Hannah Montana on the Disney Channel and "J's" deadpan delivery of his line couldn't have been any better nor timed any better, all comedians should be proud.)

*****
G: "How many balls do you have Bubbie?"
J: "Two, G."
G: "Can I play with them Bubbie?"
J: "No, G."

(Ok the 'balls' in question here were those super bouncing rubber ones, but the snicker in my grandson's voice and the look of devilment in his eyes made us think the same as you did when you read the exchange.)

*****

Check out other snippets as they occur!

Eight random facts about about me.

Saw this type of list on another blog and thought it would be of interest to some ... maybe ... if I put a similar list here.

8. I always speak my mind.
7. I like any flavor over chocolate.
6. I am very well educated.
5. I love animals.
4. Humor is my life's blood.
3. I hate onions and onions hate me.
2. I have the patience to watch paint dry and grass grow.
1. I do not tolerate bigotry, willful ignorance or other forms of hate.

Daily Funny

Random Fact: Just Waiting

Talk about eye opening random facts one comes across!

The average American driver spends SIX MONTHS of their lifetime just waiting for a traffic signal to go from Red to Green.

Taking care of the farm.

Taking care of the farm and the animals is a full time job (heck we thought we'd retired) and the one redeeming quality of being a naturist household is that no matter the dirt we kick up around the place
having to wash dirty clothes is very minimal at best.

With the river, lake, a couple of smaller ponds, an outdoor shower and a artesian well on the property having to wash dirty bodies isn't an issue either although that well is a cold one (we're thinking about damming up an area near it and feeding some of the water from the well into the 'pond' we'd be making and use gas to make it a 'Hot Spring').

Running cows and coos (that's longhaired Scots Highland cows, btw), along with horses is a great way to pass the time ... we have other interests, but we'll cover them later ... now rounding up all the fowl is a royal pain in the arse, especially when the Canadian geese come swooping in for the winter. Need to get some hogs and a few goats though.

Right now the biggest concern is the garden (both flower and Veggie) a few days back we had temperatures hovering around the 100degree mark and the early summer buds had a real rough time of it for about two weeks, then we got some rain and a week of 80s now we are creeping back into the upper 90s again ... our 'taters', 'maters', 'cukes', 'squarsh', corn, 'beanz' 'pepperz', and 'lettus' are feeling the effects already, then there are the roses, geraniums, sunflowers and daylillies and they ain't looking too chipper themselves.

Through it all the Mrs. loves it all and her picture with her "favorite pet" 'Bossie' (after Mac Duff her Jack Russell terrier of course), above is one of my favorites of her ... and to think she's a grandmother. Living on a farm and working it wasn't in her plans growing up but she has adapted well ... not bad for a Banker's pampered daughter. But then again she's still spoiled and pampered ... that new Caddy in the driveway she got yesterday is proof of that.

For the most part you cannot tell she was almost lost to me three months ago when she had several massive pulmonary embulisms and literally died and came back (two-thirds of those with pulmonary embulisms die within two hours of having a single one much less several). But with the blood thinners and changing her diet those blood clots are beginning to break up and she is out and about more and more with more and more energy.

Which one is a national disgrace?

Seeing the results of the following individual's crimes and their punishment for them I have to wonder just what is the sorry state of affairs our nations has fallen into in the past six years ...

So tell me again which is the greatest threat to our nation and a national disgrace?


Not to mention which one is the greatest threat to our national security and an International disgrace!

Morning Funny

A lot of money is tainted.

'Taint yours and 'taint mine.